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Ray Comfort (Evangelism) Michele Howe (Psalms)

Janet Mefferd Today / Janet Mefferd
The Truth Network Radio
November 18, 2021 5:03 pm

Ray Comfort (Evangelism) Michele Howe (Psalms)

Janet Mefferd Today / Janet Mefferd

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November 18, 2021 5:03 pm

Why are so many Christians scared to share the gospel with friends, family and co-workers, and how do we overcome that fear? I'll talk it over with apologist Ray Comfort as we discuss his book, "Anyone But Me." Then: Through the Psalms, the Lord offers us comfort, strength and encouragement for every moment in life. I'll talk about it with Michele Howe, author of the book, "Deliver Me." Join us for Friday's JANET MEFFERD TODAY.


This archived broadcast of Janet Mefford today is brought to you by Hartford, Lebanon, God is using hard for Lebanon to bring practical assistance and the gospel to the stricken refugee families in Lebanon for a gift of $116 you can give a child in his family survival essentials for four months and the hope of Jesus Christ which lasts forever. Call now 888-247-5499 888-247-5499 or there's a banner to is our confidence is in Christ alone, I said to be the happiest thing in this world. And yet, not only are many Christians fearful about sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ. Not all of us even believe it's necessary. You'll remember that not too long ago, Barna research reported that 47% of millennial's agree at least somewhat that it's wrong to share your personal beliefs with someone of a different faith in hopes that they will one day share your faith. Yet the Bible says in Romans 10 as it is written, how beautiful are the feet of those who preach the good news, and faith comes from hearing, and hearing through the word of Christ. So how can we share our faith in Christ confidently were to get some help at that today from apologist author TV host and popular speaker Ray comfort. He addresses this in his latest book called anyone but me. 10 ways to overcome your fear and be prepared to share the gospel raise. So good luck and be back. How are you wonderful how you think about that beautiful ribbon about what is often look at your feet, ugly reject jellybean at the end the gods today, even FPL locally belly ugly feet beautiful.

If we preach the gospel so what the great commission is actually reproach on the body of Christ if we found a cure to cancer.

We shouldn't become bonded to take it to those who are suffering we should just run and yet we have been commanded to go forgive a lot be like to recruit you because we won't go with what chickens where raw, we do say anyone but me, and that includes me. Also that now see now that's hard for me to believe because you are the evangelist extraordinaire.

I mean how many videos have we all watched of you sharing the gospel confronting people with the law on showing them that they're liars and adulterers and all the rest of the will see their need for Christ. How can you be fearful or why have you been fearful about evangelism crowd, and I hate rejection I'm I'm not kidding. If I'm looking through Home Depot or somewhere like that. And I see someone from the photometric life.

I know I want to get a money safely. Please don't do this.

This is my poor little souls. I hate being rejected how I feel on the inside.

And that's just crazy with so fearful of rejection when it's not going to happen like heck… Even though James who is good, handle the motto down through history were pretty safe in this country and all that we all fear is the fear of man. The rejection thing and was just going to get another control and I got I got to say this, the every little lady looks like a Goliath to me as I got sick of the gospel of I'm not kidding always that imagination my mind you just got to hate me for this. If I mentioned looking for God. 87% of Americans want under God kicked in the Pledge of Allegiance honey if you go to Google not and and so what you do is you just don't think of yourself you think of the fate of the person you want to share the gospel with the fate of hell. Mine is the fear of rejection is no comparison whatsoever and that the Goliath shrink down to is the key thing okay like I can do this the same as a firefighter you the lady three kids clinging to her on the first floor with flames behind got to get up that letter is gonna reach out and take all the kids terrified absolutely. But what he's doing is not thinking of himself. Anything that will fight those children around. That's what will go to to think of the fate of the ungodly, and that's what gives you courage is your love is more you know prominent than your fear and I mean this is what you get into Ray when you're talking in your book about the most important qualities that we have to develop in order to be effective in sharing the gospel. The first when you mention is being loving and tying this of course to first Corinthian's 13.

That's exactly what our motivation ought to be for evangelism, but why is that love not show up in our actions in going out and sharing the gospel more than we do know what shows up in mine. The Bible is given much the same love is much perform as a Christian is a nice clean upstanding businessman on the outside on the inside out good with them is not every woman I looked at. I just laughed it off like every other red-blooded guy got it brought that out on judgment day I could be justly damned to hell and I know that I'm so thankful that I find really annoying about the English language is grateful when I want to say how grateful I am God saving me. I'm so grateful it doesn't cut the mustard. Yeah, the apostle Paul should thanks be on the God of the young people gift you have a lasting life to me what I cannot put into words. I put in the works for a law. I can't express how grateful I am looking I'm not show you how grateful I am. But doing what you want and not only that I'm doing it because a lot of people love the thought of anyone else who flies me would become a nation that just given the question of killing children in the womb, adultery, fornication, homosexuality, blasphemy, pornography of the whole nation is given to it. And if we care about the mere fate would go around them and take like.wish the shadow of death why you're right about that. What's interesting to me as the world has a very different definition of love than we do. When you mention the LGBT aspect of things that they'll talk about love wins and I'm thinking, but that's not love for me to say that your sin is something that is wonderful not to be celebrated and that's true of any sin. But that's the slogan that immediately came to mind. Can you talk a little bit about the difference of it. When we look at what love is from the Lord's perspective versus what the world sometimes calls love you-kind of a jealous, selfish, crowded root, crazy but I hear some Christians say marriages to go to work at it.

I haven't had to work at. I find it quite easy to love my wife and love is what makes me back down what I want long way and I do about why sometimes I have a night. She'll say no that's not a good idea and I want to just put the food up on the back and say no. I want to do this. I'm going to do this this walk and Rick a marriage when you become a Christian. You say, not my will but you will be done every decision I make should look to God for his approval or disapproval. Whether it's a small decision whether something is going to the French small decision to have another 16 potatoes decision to look at lighting extol whatever ago to give them both to the Lord was a little what would you have me to do. That's what a Christian and he would have us lost their fate and that takes courage and that takes a lot of effectual like a person that you know the Bible says homosexuals in the kingdom of God. But I have one thing on my side. The power of reason and the conscience and the other thing of the will to live. I know the homosexual doesn't want to die coming in on the oh I don't want to die.

That's his God-given will to live. God placed eternity on. That's one thing a Pete appeal to the other thing is is conscience that in the knowledge of right and wrong when he says to me I was going to homosexual culture.

From the moment I can remember. I looked at lighting extol the blood love to go to bed with her.

She just gorgeous but it doesn't make it right. Just because I got that inclination to do that which my heart desires known as Olson and he is a list of what God considers sent be not deceived do not receive neither fornicators, nor adulterers, nor I almost homosexual.

So please will hear the kingdom of God. I point out that what idolatry which the third woman, which is the sin of making God in your own image, which is what we came to do with old God is a God of love and God of mercy and repaint this kind of great big sort of cuddly snuggly Katie.

It is no sense of just what truth for the Bible says when we get it right right understanding of God's nature and character idolaters, adulterers and fornicators and fees will not inherit God at the 511 homosexual of an adult role of a Lyra fee by dollars going to speak the truth in love, and can he 11 my time.

That's what I'm aiming at. I don't want to think that I'm condescending.

I love them. And that's the reason I want yet that's right well and this is very much tied to where we go when we die.

Ray, this is not much something people want to talk about today.

If we know and believe what the word of God says about there being an eternal hell.

Then we should love people enough to give them the good news that will prevent them from going there. This is just kind to me. Evangelism 101, but I don't hear a lot of people talking about that yet we tend to fight the symptoms.

Rob and I know that when I became a Christian. Everything in my client was inclined and suddenly wanted to do good.

I began a righteousness which is a miracle, God gives you a personal miracle.

Remember the Pharisees to give us a sign in Jesus and no sign be given the sign of Jonah. Yeah, that's a one second hold that thought. I'm so sorry we got a run to a very quick break will come back with great comfort to anyone but me. This is but will be back on Janet for those of us who live in America. It may be hard to believe but there are people in the country of Lebanon with never heard about Jesus. That's exactly why Hartford Lebanon is there working in the nation that's home to more than 2 million Syrian refugee families who have arrived there to escape civil war and terrorism but every day hard for Lebanon is they are reaching out to these needy families in Jesus name telling them about him, and providing food, Christian education and survival essentials and the Lord is changing their lives. Let me tell you about one of those refugees any fat who is 10 years old she lost her mother when she was just a toddler, but hard for Lebanon met her as they were delivering food portions to her family with no opportunity for formal education and Eva wakes her father up early in the morning when hard for Lebanon's educational fund truck is scheduled to arrive recently during a skit about God's love honey for placed her faith and trust in Jesus for salvation. And now, because her father is illiterate. She's reading the Bible to him each evening.

This family, although currently living in very tough times is slowly starting to realize the hope that only comes through Jesus Christ and the hope that only reaches them because people like you give to get the gospel to them.

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You're listening to great happy with this in great-aunt with us Ray comfort apologist, author, TV host and popular speaker. Also, prolific author anyone but me is his latest 10 ways to overcome your fear and be prepared to share the gospel you were discussing just before we went to the break. There Ray about the issue of how and how hell should be a motivator for us to want to share the good news of Jesus with our neighbors, and you'd mentioned this demand on Jesus about give us a sign and how he did not rain, no sign will be given, but the sign of Jonah. Jonah from we know that Jonah is a type of Christ being swallowed by dear and then resurrected and the power of the gospel left the gospel assignment God will give you if you're seeking a sign is a personal miracle. He will take you and make you a brand-new creature on the inside. If if God gave us a vision or something like that would take us some of the talk is out of the vision because the vision converted us to intellectually thinking a certain way that all you must be real when God changes you on the inside.

Nothing will convince you often because the experience with God pulls you to be born again, was born was radical, the next best. Suddenly, I bit being born-again was just as radical and the miracle of God took me a similar sin of the Crunk and iniquity like his eyes filled with adultery and overnight cools me to thirst for righteousness, and not been doing that. Yes, just wanting to do that which is why I didn't myself to do that God transform in rows or upon my hot and cool in his statutes. That's what this nation needs the transformation of 1/2, so there's no racism, no more adultery, no mobile stealing patient last week will be something pass away. When God makes a new creature in Christ. What, that's the fruit of the gospel. The essence of the gospel is to save us from wrath to come.

That's why we become Christians but the fruit of the gospel is that we will live in a righteousness. That's what America needs for nation that's been given the somewhat thing the bad for Joe Aman was never needed the gospel more than we need it right now. I agree with you there Ray you talk about a wonderful passage of Scripture.

Everybody will know it's one of my favorites.

And that is Ephesians chapter 6, especially from verses 10 on talking about the armor of God is kind of the basis for some of these qualities we need to have an you mentioned obedience and also wind into that Samson's strength because here we have this reference to being strong in the Lord, preceded by the word. Finally, so talk about this a little bit you pull in six is talking about the fact we wrestle not against lot in the world would just believe God's word with arms and every question or lease illnesses with people of God personalities living within them. The Bible makes it clear that he said he had the will we take that literally.

It's not metaphorical.

There is a demonic world and the Bible says God of the tank kill and destroy the Mets Rep every day kill you destroyed because people's lives said the Bible looks about as a roaring lion, seeking whom he made a vow if you're in Satan's territory for serving sin. He may yes permission to the value because it has the power of death over you so pull gives us the onset of the thesis. I'm finally my brethren take on the whole of God above all, taking the shield of faith and trust in God, you know, we trust pilots we get onto a plane and smelled it right used get on planes that doctors when they give us to build trust companies with a life role, swallow it. Now we take two maybe three hours just close it. We trust the life and it felt as Berry mistakes a lot of people right because their faith is being an adult what he was doing this all around us.

We trust elevators.

We trust that breaks we trust white signals when you come out to the fictional screen. The other guy come in the other direction flights is green and often feel with two lights is stuck on green account in the middle and people die because their faith is misdirected down, but the Bible says it's impossible for God to lie, that means you can trust them with your eternal salvation because it cannot lie all these things pilots and doctors, lights and elevators can seriously take allies because we've had faith in the wrong direction. Gobble neighborliness down and that's that that's the Bible pulls talking about trust in the Lord Yuri coronavirus. Keep your eyes on them. Don't look what's happening know I watch the news. Sometimes I regret it because they have taken with it. Believe when it bleeds it leads to the inch degree every news is horrible now, thing happening, people reap and use without crying that great actors and it's all happening because we have faith in God and this would turn it back on. The gobblers came to mom that Israel continually pin the back on straight into idolatry and gave himself fictional sin that so nation and were now on going to be on the calls anger where we are a God thing we've gotta go play Cunningham's and God's into giving plagues. If you look at the Egypt gave Canada grown the last teleplay and so to say got two nice within a plague on America is just not biblically go to Seabury many times for that Israel leave anybody for what you want to play go you want to, so that your enemies chase you the only interest to seek God and for God, forgive us nation.

The lesson transform us through the power of the gospel. That's right well well you know something else that you discuss his defiance and citing the real enemy. You touched on that just a moment ago that we are not warring against people. This is something I think we sometimes forget if we see somebody who's particularly nasty or particularly argumentative or hostile you seen a lot of these people in your online work Ray.

How do you get your focus on the fact that there is a spiritual war going on for men and women's souls and that we need to remember that when we are sharing the gospel was sometimes hostile people take too good to those that despite what you you shoot this bike leisure. I really take that some guy night in Chicago, had the police come round my home base to gate me for threatening to sacrifice my children to the Lord and the two officers came and had a complaint with the children, married with Kip and said the officer looked at my my computer and sold the atheists that hate me and they just left a minute but I found out who that guy was ahead of us find it. We want and I send a gift basket and I continually like to do because that's what we commanded to do and have that thought in mind, this person is blinded by Satan. He doesn't know what he's saying and imagine him as a solo toss with the meds and was difficult when you see someone who's angry and creating havoc within the church. Just imagine what this Christmas can be like when the transformative power of God that helps me to overcome my prejudices and and then let love God flow through me and show them kindness and gentleness.

I really like that and that sometimes the opposite of what your flesh wants to do. I am sure you want to say you want to set up a fruit basket that probably wasn't the first thought in your head about what you might want to do.

Somebody like that like to take in the pool there you go, but I don't know what you committed themselves to him who judges like Ken and that's what we guys it will disguise horrible, but I'm just going to give you what you say shall love the other thing I do is a tightly fixed when something horrible someone for something is not true. I count, stop, or even take it public to make it worse.

I Jesus said a mineral volume tissue settlement of evil against you falsely rejoice and be exceeding glad leap for joy, so I got my office and I physically leap for joy. I can't get too high off the ground. I do that I do a physical leap for joy because Jesus it do it makes me laugh one day. I did do that and it was a knock on my door and said person the door for someone just given the ministry $20,000… We should let Kyle next time you mix will makes no sense to the world makes sense to us because we look for God in the world and given us an instruction book and one thing is for my characters when I buy something needs to be put together a team to not look at the instructions. I hate to smolder in a foreign language. Sometimes the exchange I give a go myself make a mess of a minute. Instructions Bible instruction booklet got her own and made a mess of things. That's right. What about the aspect that you discuss concerning faithfulness. Clearly we talked. I know before in previous interviews about what the gospel is how to share the gospel. It's really important issue say to share Sinai before you share Calvary so it means something to the center who hasn't yet confronted his own sin, but what about our faithfulness. As Christians, how important is that Ray to the task of evangelism on general lady made a comment to say I went out what race did I imitate a question. A lot of these videos and it couldn't go to what the person to fit a milestone and he was just so self-righteous and in this person that is been faithful. Came back and said I just feel so miserable that I wrote back and fit because you have been faithful. That's what God sees in many times I put my foot in my mouth.

Many times I meet self-righteous person. That's how we live, you learn to walk. You don't remember what you got bruises. She got up from you: you risk your life you start looking in your fellow man and the pain that saloon that again is a little kid and to climb up on that shelf again because I fell over and that's how we learn a lot.

Go to take a break, which is from when I fished out of my mouth and my footnote many times and for things that I realize that God is about success. He handled backside.

He wants faithfulness and prove yourself to be true and faithful and federal amendments that because I want to reach the lost.

This is about and am not a plumber about the kingdom of God offices.

This is something that the tunnel is not painful. So I'm going to do this thing, because you told me to show myself. I love it.

Well, you can learn a lot about evangelism from Ray comfort anyone but me is the name of the book living is the website. Ray is always wonderful to talk to you. God bless you, thank you for being here will be back on Janet for today. After this this archived broadcast of Janet map are today is brought to you by Hartford, Lebanon, God is using hard for Lebanon to bring practical assistance and the gospel to the stricken refugee families in Lebanon for a gift of $116 you can give a child in his family survival essentials for four months and the hope of Jesus Christ which lasts forever. Call now 888-247-5499 888-247-5499 there's a banner to here's your hose show today at Ecclesiastes chapter 4 tells us to are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor.

If either of them falls down one can help the other up. All this is a great description of a good friendship to people who make each other better and help one another in times of need.

What does it mean to have a good friend and to be a good friend Morgan export today with Michelle how she is joining me now to talk about her book called navigating the friendship maze Michelle welcome, so good to have you with us. They absolutely will you talk about a biblical friendship.

What exactly is a biblical friendship. How would you define way that I would say I got two different passages of Scripture immediately and I think of Galatians 522 and 23. Work with the spirit know that each of us should always be growing in our love, joy, P patient kindness and all the different wonderful characteristics that the Holy Spirit is always developing enough packages. First Corinthians 13 deluxe chapter 9 is about friendship, just in general are we visiting patient kindness mapping India we don't.

Both were not proud were not really studying each one of these characteristics and ask of you say and I know growing in those areas and am I exhibiting no early action toward the people that I call my friend now and I think you really have to do a self check pretty often. They hang out. I want to be that kind of friend is somebody out.

Michael can print building into my life as well right well it's interesting this whole concept of friendship becomes a little complicated in the digital age. I have a lot of friends from many many years that I've had them around and we are mainly in contact digitally. Just because of the pace of life, but I I've heard a lot of women comment on the fact that it's hard at a certain stage in life. Maybe when you have small children or your kids get a little bit older. It's harder and harder to find a good friend.

Have you talk to women about that issue about the difficulty of making friends as you get older and how it's just more challenging sometimes because of time constraints out that ironically social media and twitter and Graham Lincoln, Pinterest and all the different right you can get on wall make you feel that you're connected to people you care about because I can get on my cousin doing what they're doing and I feel like I'll I'm a real beat on what's happening in his life. You know nothing like getting across from the table. Orsino looking at someone in there. I cherry a couple coffee or a meal and really honing in on what they're not playing Daniel really looking at the nonverbal cues when you're developing a real good relationship with somebody and I agreed. Here we get the more we can ourselves thinking I have a friend or I'm on Instagram and I can see what everybody doing plate real life interaction and you know mom can't the island. There were little kids and now I couldn't keep up with my can't hardly let alone developing new friendships. Now my kids got into junior high and high school and college and now they're all grown and gone. However, like Disney felt it ever going to change whatever not going to be busy and I think we just have to prioritize relationships yes I agree because it just because they call them Facebook friends doesn't mean they're all friends you can't have 900 freshmen since it's just not possible to have that kind of deep level of friendship with that many people and that's part of the problem to I think for a lot of Christian women they want a deep friendship. They don't just want a series of shallow ghetto associations with other women where you're not really getting to the heart of it, what advice would you give to women about making a really good friends, and setting. No download that the all of the factors for being able to develop a deep friendship, and grow into the kind of friend you want.

Now you gotta be that person. First thing I hear a lot of women and I'll start saying well I have you invited anybody out for coffee you exercise.

If anybody I mean in your volunteer activity.

Have you tried to offer the hand of friendship to any of those when you think you might click with and you know a lot tired and now say well you make the overture because you know often.

We always fill everybody busy.

They don't have time for me. Well, if you become that friendly friend, you'll find all for coming into your life to anybody and you really don't know many people and you get into a church and talk to the path you talk to the women later and they pretty much have an idea who make up the congregation who come in every week and just share your heart, looking for good friendships out of iron sharpening iron friendship will help you because they want the people that you know there better under them and with them to develop strong relationships as well right well did look what should you look for in a friend.

I think sometimes this can be extremely subjective, but what would you advise women to look for if she's in that stage of life where maybe she's moved to a new town and she's trying to meet some new people and maybe you know this is a difficult thing to start just from from scratch, trying to find a new friend what you look for in somebody that you want to be friends with friendship relationships that you want to go to their life off about when you get out hang around people matter where you're at your watch how they're interacting with others and I'll never forget what Paul Tripp said that people will reveal to you who they are.

If you watch them carefully and long enough because the person who let's say is disloyal or backbiting, or selfish. He call if you down acting that way toward others. You can guarantee that if you get in a relationship with them.

Eventually those bad behaviors will fall on you and we always like now were the exception.

If we try carefully before sent to their key issues by lava happen. After a while we know that that real person just tends to come out, warning you now read balcony think your observer and watch yourself when can you admire what women have their focus of Greeley honoring the Lord Jesus Christ, day in and day out. Now that Lana will be in the same direction. Watch for those women about being in the present cannot make an older woman like you. My younger yeah matter about their age 50, saying, hey, are we on the same trajectory in life you know when you will stand out to you right. Should you necessarily look for somebody who's like you or maybe for somebody who's not so much like you would be more of a complement to your personality, but might have been were more alike than different wearing baby 34 years, but I'll tell you that your online week and I John where he week so same kind of relationship you want friends or not your mirror images because you know I like to be around people who are different than me because they help me laugh more, and introvert so I got several friends were extrovert and enlightened me and I need that I need to be able to laugh and have fun more than I do think you know look friendship that you know my thanks for your weakness and vice versa. When you get a variety of friend different personalities and different gifts and talents really adds a rich your life rather than if you're just trying to pick little call you out will tightly knit community where delegates agreed with anybody in your you really can get know God. Craig different and beautifully different that I think diversity is a wonderful thing. It friendship will it is now another thing that you addresses the concept of frenemy's who would be a friend to me and how do you avoid those frenemy's first chapter I identified and a person, and I remember years ago having a gal that I would call my friend every time I left for president help again. I felt like I was not good enough why mother I wasn't making that ministry. Troy and I just was never and now remember my husband thing to me.

Every time you meet her present you're in a bad mood, so why help me on that because I never saw her as a friend me.

But you know after I really looking at the conversations we had and how she really brought me down pretty strong personalities that took a lot for her gently douse the flames on whatever I get any ideas you know that I was just talking around with her good friends. Because by my good friend now will listen to me eat a good bad and ugly but they'll always get what you're feeling, I understand your struggle as words that work for you iron sharpening iron to be honest with each other throughout the time of the one to handle doing.

I love it Michelle, how is with us navigating the friendship maze and will come back on Jennifer today. Maybe no matter when this is the end of the story of a young mom who plan to end her pregnancy but chose life after visiting a pre-born center pre-born steps into the lives of hurting young women who were being told that a pre-born baby is not a life pre-born is the largest provider of free ultrasounds in the country and the direct answer to Planned Parenthood helping young moms choose life. I feel like it was made for me to head this is something I need for reason you can be a part of choosing life with young hurting women across the country.

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Thank you for your listening to you today. Thank you for being with us and my guess is Michelle Howell, author of navigating the friendship maze.

The search for authentic friendship and I think we can all relate to this. You really want to be able to find good lifelong friends.

If you can, and sometimes it's easier said than done, but Michelle is giving us some good tips things you talk about in your book. Michelle is the issue of principles for every friendship. What are you talking about the other two principles I like earlier I really liked women to think about trying to develop relationships that go now for the long haul of light now (but a marathon yell and an enduring friendship of biblical friendship means that you don't and the time they stand the test of forgetting one another, helping one another a biblically challenging one another in all of enduring hardship and point to gather as well as the flipside and enjoying all the wonderful bonuses of life. Like celebrating and laughing and leisure activity doing all life gather good, bad, and everything in between with honesty with integrity and with the transparency that what you're finding it talking right and that's what a lot of a great peer peer friendship is because your thinking battling the same challenges may be in your marriage and with your kid or vocationally, or your ministry. Why ever get panicked at each other. But you know I like to encourage women to not give up on women who hurt them. To me about somebody who maybe talk or maybe set something harsh you are maybe disagreeing with you or even know you felt a little while you work. I think because every relationship is going to have it bump and bruise that and you can't get throughout everybody working because you know I unintentionally hurt people. People unintentionally hurt me.

It's part of being human and were sinful creatures that we have to be able okay.

Let's talk about that really you know Russell through to the other side, but we can have a stronger relationship before the conflict even began. I think that's good advice because I have seen this throughout my life and some of my friends have told me stories about this where still make one wrong move and then the woman cuts him off or not friends anymore, and then what that leads to is the woman saying Monica to trust anymore women Emmy-winning can be very hard on each other in a way that were not necessarily is hard on man, you know, this sense of betrayal or somebody said something mean about me these sorts of things. Why think it is even with Christian women.

Sometimes that were not willing to forgive were not willing to give somebody a break and say hey you know what, I'm not perfect either way kind of emotion that the Lord put inside of us, because we can love that when were hurt, hard, our hearts really great. Now they really breaking Holly how can she thought that about so-and-so against me and I didn't talk to me about it in the woundedness that we really feel me know Cryer will go to the Lord's grace always go back to that person gently and kindly talk about this because I think more often know they wanted sure yeah they think that not even get what I was saying until my husband said I will harsh). I like yeah well that's true and and again going back to this principle of being a good friend. I think that's the right place to start because we can't control other people, but we certainly can work on ourselves and spend time with the Lord and and really be cognizant of those passages you talked about before. Galatians 5 and the fruits of the spirit and the love chapter 1st contains chapter 13 what would you advise Christian women to do on becoming a friend who goes the distance with other friends.

How do I become that sort of a friend I think we all have to invest ourselves into knowing what God's work that how do we read that word. Yes, we pray, we meditate on that later were struggling for inpatient person and Taipei. I want to get you pulling out portions of Scripture that will help me bigger perspective you nothing and you know that mercy always triumphs over judgment and on. I need to be patient and kind and gentle when I'm with others really helping the Lord to renew my mind and how I find how I think about hot button topic in my life that are struggles for me. I cannot get the real truth for my husband because he'll company tell him, but you differently to Frank and taking away really think you're struggling with it why you right now why what you know what they know what you write because I think I'm thinking about right now and I have sleeping and I haven't been getting out a priority to the first thing that you develop a relationship with the Lord first. Yes you now and really after camp with a humble heart. Show me who I really am. I think I am, but who am I really, you know, we start with ourselves and then we start branching out we start making a list of all the friend that we already Know how can I get better or where I struggle with this woman yet. She struggled with me. How can we work through that will be stronger in the chain than as individual time and I think we Americans when everything done that styles happen that way. Our whole life learning and growing and maturing. We need to take a life long project for ourselves and for others. Right what one of the other things that you talk about is this issue of speaking the word of truth out loud and often no clearly you have to get to a certain stage of the friendship or you can get away with that if you just met a woman and then you exhort her. She might never want to talk to you again. But how do you do that when you are friends with another woman and you really need to speak the truth in love. How do you decide when is the time to do that and what is the right way to bring that about without losing your friend in the process chapters in the book that really kind of dialogue. I had several friends when I was a younger mom and mom frequently into my life and blank, but what I wasn't aware of and I remember the first time a friend and had been a friend with her for a long time that she had something to me about spoken that way about a family member and it cut me aback because my family member with thinning and I wanted and she allowed me to understand how you're feeling know what you're knocking to get anywhere by being better or becoming angry at you up early every relationship you have been able to process it, but it took me a bit to get through it and I will say you you just pointed out, you can do this with a new friend because I think we really earned the right to speak truth into somebody's life. We really do right in the front of them able to do that my life and love me. I know they want what's best for me in my marriage with Mike my grant get you whatever they might like to play you know what I see this area and out think you would like it if you are looking at it let me help you travel through to the other side. You know, and I think we all have to be you know, asking the Lord for humility, know how to teach about how me to be no to someone when you're speaking truth into my life biblical. Now there's a flipside to that you have people who will not think biblical truth into your life, but they will try to bring you down.

That's an unhealthy friendship. Healthy relationship yet to be discerning enough to tell the difference what the other thing that I enjoyed in the book was the kind of friend every woman needs and you actually give some advice that women should have different types of friends maybe older friends.

Younger friends you have some peers. Why is it important do you think to have different kinds of women friends.

While I believe everyone and every man should have somebody that they can look at as a mentor meeting with them. No regularly or could look at farther along in life you can go to when you needed by when you need help. But when you're not sure and you know that their life is one honorable and you know just Christ honoring all the way through to share with you. I did this right and wrong, and here's what I would do if I were you thinking somebody could get a little bit farther along in life appears in the center there something that you can look at and I need to say anything and just laugh together because you get your both in the same trench at the same time and you kinda get current on the run. They okay were right in the middle. Together we can give each other talk along the way there somebody to build until we get somebody a little bit you know. No younger mom to get drunk.

You and I want a divorce. Maybe you know it's a young widow just wants to be Mary. Whatever you can help her see what's good in her life and capitalize on it and help her build contentment and purpose in different chips along the way with you.

15 years ago and got got me through that faith. But you know you will build on your own remembrances of God's faithfulness and you place them into someone else's heart that's really good advice because wherever you are in life you have somebody you still need to learn from and somebody who can learn from you, and you can find a whole host of new kinds of friends when you are willing to look more broadly and have those kinds of biblical friendships really great advice will Michelle with us the name of her book navigating the friendship maze Michelle such a joy to have you here. Thank you so much for being with us today with the privilege.

Have a wonderful day you too. God bless you, thank you for joining us here on Janet my for today.

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