“Where’d the Passion in My Marriage Go?” Jason and Tori Benham

The Lord showed me it was gratitude. It was genuine gratitude.

Like when you feel gratitude, you are bonded to the people that you're grateful for. I thought it was the best thing ever that Jason was pursuing me. I thought it was the most amazing thing that he cherished me. I was so grateful for all the little things that he did for me.

And I took it in, and I thought it was amazing. Welcome to Family Life Today, where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I'm Ann Wilson. And I'm Dave Wilson, and you can find us at familylifetoday.com or on the Family Life app.

This is Family Life Today. OK, I think I know the answer to this question, but how long do you think it was before you feel like you fell out of love with me in marriage? Please don't say a day. Six months. It took that long?

That long? I mean, it wasn't like you fell out of love. No, I loved you.

I just was disillusioned and thought, oh, I really don't like him. Let me ask this. How many couples do you think experienced something like that? At some point, I think we look at our spouse and we think, oh, they're not what I thought they would be. And so, yeah, I think almost, I would say almost every couple. There could be one, a few people, but do they?

Yeah, and I think- Are they honest? I think most couples would say there's a battle in marriage. I don't think a lot of couples would say there's beauty in that battle. And we've got Jason and Tori Benham back, and you wrote a book called Beauty in Battle. So let's talk about that. Welcome back to Family Life Today. Thank you. It's good to be with you guys. So glad to be here. Your authors, your speakers, you have a podcast.

What's the name of your podcast? Beauty in Battle. Beauty in Battle. Beauty in Battle.

Good name. Yeah, so, and I know you wrote about this, but even as we talk about that love feeling dissipating, when did that happen for you? Was it early? It was pretty early on. Yeah.

Pretty early? Were you allowed to love with me for right from the jump? Our dating years were like pretty magical. They were long distance, and so it was very much like Jason was obsessed with me and I loved it.

Yep. And then we got married and that obsession turned to his career and providing. I got pregnant five months after we got married, so I think there was just a lot of pressure and all of that attention went from me to providing. And so pretty quickly, I think it was probably within that first year, I was often crying in the bathroom like, he doesn't love me. This is not the man I married. He doesn't cherish me anymore. This is not Jason.

This is not who I thought that he was. And then I had Trey, had our oldest, and then right away, we just started having kids pretty quickly. And I think that by the time I had the second, I thought it was time to pull my big girl pants up and just settle in, that this was the new norm, that life is not a romance and that this is okay. We can still have a really good relationship without it being the way it was.

Jason, did you know she was feeling that? No, not really. But you know, we typically believe in marriage that engagement ends at I do. But that's not when your engagement is supposed to end. Man do.

Yeah, man do. But you know, it's like, so once you say I do and you're married, now you're no longer engaged. Well, it's a big problem if you're no longer engaged. You have to be fully engaged at all times. So once you get engaged, then you never stop engaging. And so what I did was what a lot of men do is, hey, accomplish that. Now I'm going to move on and I'm going to engage the next thing. And for me, it was a career, you know, it's like I was a former pro baseball player.

Now I got to figure out what I'm going to do to make money. I had one woman write me a letter and she said, I feel like I've been totally duped. She said, my husband pursued me, engaged with me. He was amazing. She said, then we got married and now he's off with his career. And she said, I feel like he was on the hunt. He saw me. He shot me. He begged me. He put me on the mantle and now he's off on the next hunt. And I think a lot of women can feel that. And so it's easy to become resentful, which you didn't, Tori. You're like, okay, this is the reality. I think I would have if I wasn't in survival mode.

I think I was too busy to get- Yeah, because you got two kids. Dave did the same thing. We start our church. He's gone.

He's out. So what do you do about that? And you're saying you have to stay engaged. You stay engaged. So the first thing I would say to that woman who says, I feel as though I've been duped is she needs to change the perspective and realize that your husband's the one who's been duped. He's been duped to believe that, oh, you won your wife.

Now go out here and win this thing in your career. And that's going to give you some sense of fulfillment. You see, this is why you have to open your eyes to the battle. He is not her problem.

Satan is the problem. And so just imagine as a mother, if your son gets married and then he treats your daughter-in-law that way. Well, the first thing you would think is you wouldn't think, oh, daughter-in-law, you should be upset at my son. You would think, son, you have no idea what you're doing. You don't realize what you're doing. So that man's been duped.

I was duped. And so it was five years into marriage for us. And I'm up early in the morning. You know, David and I, we teach entrepreneurs all over about how to run your business according to biblical principles. David, your brother. David's my brother. Yep. My twin brother. Thank you.

I was going to say, I've never done that with you. But we have a two-page business plan that we teach people. The first page is just, you know, your mission vision with some of your tactics and your financial strategy that you need.

But the second page only has two words on it, listening prayer. And every morning you're going to get up as a business owner and you're going to listen to what your business partner, the majority owner of your business wants to tell you. And so I'm up doing this. I've got listening prayer and God's given me all these downloads for our business.

And it was growing big, like a hundred offices in 35 different states. And it was just fantastic. And one morning I woke up in listening prayer and the Lord told me to start praying for my marriage. And I was like, okay, so I'll do that. I'll start praying for my marriage. And so I started to think about where we were in our relationship. So we're five years into marriage. And I would say Tori and I probably settled into probably a six or a seven on a scale of one to 10.

So it's not bad, but it's not a 10. But you said settled, so you are settling. I was settling. And so as I began to think through that, I mean, we were still friends. We still loved each other. We liked each other, but maybe sometimes we didn't like each other. So this wasn't like we were enemies and hated each other or anything, but I knew that we had settled and I had bought the lie that once you get married, you know, that romantic flame is supposed to go away. And then you just, you go right into it. That's a lie by the way.

So first you have to recognize that's a lie. God made you to have a 10 marriage and you can feel that 10, but you just have to invite him into it. So five years in, I was up in the morning praying and I felt like the Lord told me, get down on your knees next to Tori every single morning and pray for her that you would have that romantic flame for her once again that you once had. So that's what I did every morning, about five 30 in the morning, I would get down onto my knees next to the bed and I would put my hands on Tori. While she's still asleep?

While she's still asleep. Did you know he was doing this Tori? I did.

And what did you think and feel about it? I was like, just please don't wake me up. I made sure that I put my hands above the shoulder so she didn't think I was trying to make an early morning move. So I would put my hands on her and pray and my prayer wasn't Lord change her or change me. My prayer was God reignite the passion that I once felt for her because I remembered back to what I used to feel and I'm like, I don't really feel that anymore.

And I didn't really have a desire to feel it, but I said, Lord, I think you want me to feel that again. So I began to pray two weeks went by and I did it every single morning for two weeks. And we ended up at a party, a birthday party for a friend of ours.

And as typical, you know, married couple, you walk into the house, I went over and hang out with the dudes. She went to hang out with the girls, except this time I was conscious of where Tori was. I had been praying for her for two weeks. It's interesting where your treasure is there, your heart will go. So now I'm thinking about her more because I'm praying about us.

It's a very good marriage principle. And so I went looking for her and I saw her in the kitchen, but she wasn't alone. There was another guy that was talking to her and I stopped there at the doorway of the kitchen. And I just instantly, I felt a little something in my heart. My heart started to beat pretty fast.

And then I saw the dude bust a joke and she started laughing and the way she responded to it didn't sit well with me. So as that heartbeat turned into a swarm of fighter pilot jets in my heart, you know, I started to feel like I wanted to fight. And then I saw him reach out and give her a hug. And when he hugged her and she responded by hugging him, I took off in a dead on sprint. I ran, I jumped over the kitchen island where there was food.

So food was going everywhere. Wait, wait, wait, wait. This is for real. Yeah. It's like a movie.

Well, follow me for a second. I jumped onto that table, food was going everywhere. And just before I punched him square in his jaw, I woke up, but now I'm glad that you said that. And because when you have a dream, your subconscious mind and your body doesn't know it was a dream. So I was really feeling those emotions while I was sleeping. When I woke up, I was sweating. My heart was like at 180, you know, and I looked over at her and she's sleeping and she has no idea she's in love with another man.

She does not know it. And I woke her up and instantly I started asking all the questions. Is there somebody pursuing you?

Is there anything going on that I need to know about right now? And so finally she convinced me. You think he was crazy? I did. I was like, babe, it was a dream.

You need to settle down. I wanted to fight. He felt it.

Really? It was bad. But listen, this is so cool. Then after, you know, 10 minutes of interrogating questions to Tori, I realized, okay, it's a dream.

It's all good. I woke up and it was about four, 30 or five o'clock in the morning. And so I got down on my knees next to her, just like I had done for two weeks prior. And I placed my hands on her. And the minute I placed my hands on her, the Lord just spoke to me. He's like, I gave you that dream. You've forgotten how to pursue your wife. I want you to pursue her like that man in the dream was pursuing her. God spoke to me through a dream, you know, and I was, I was raised Baptist. We don't do dreams and visions and all this stuff. I'm like, this is great. This stuff actually works. And so the Lord spoke to me and said, I want you to pursue her like you did before.

And you know what's crazy? I'm like, okay, God, but how do I do that? You see, before I got married, I didn't know anything about relationships, but I knew how to pursue her. Now I'm married. I've already pursued her.

Now I've got her and I've forgotten how to do it. And the Lord brought me to Revelation 2 verse four through five, when the church of Ephesus, you know, the church, the betrothed bride of Jesus, and Jesus is speaking to her in Revelation and says, you've forgotten your first love. And then he says, I want you to remember how far you've fallen. I want you to repent and redo the things you did at first. And God gave me that three-step plan on how to get my romantic flame back. Remember, repent, redo. Remember what you used to feel for your spouse before you got married.

Like go back. What songs were important to you then? Go back and listen to them again and start remembering what you used to feel. Drum up all those emotions. Emotion is an impulse to act. God gave us emotion.

So we need to drum those up through mood, through atmosphere, through music. And you didn't have to do that when you were dating. No. They just came. Naturally. But you're saying now we go back and we remember.

Yeah, that's right. And you have to do it. And then you repent for, for not being at a 10. You know, that's hard for couples to think about. Like if you say, what's your relationship on a scale of one to 10 in terms of what you feel for each other?

Probably an eight. Okay. Well, let's repent of that. Like that's a hard teaching. So God, repentance is the reset button.

It's where we start. Repent. God, I'm not at a 10 because God's not just your father. He's your father-in-law.

So how do you feel about his son or daughter? If you don't feel a 10, repent. Ask God to forgive you and then redo the things you did at first. The things that you did to win each other's heart at first, do those things again. Next thing you know, the romantic flame will come back.

So it did for you? So Jason started pursuing just like when we were dating. And at this point now we have three kids, small kids. And I remember him pursuing and I was thinking, okay, the old Jason is back, but I do not know where the old Tori is. Like I don't even remember how I used to respond to his pursuit.

Like we were in a totally different stage of life. And so as Jason began to pursue me, I remember just kind of not really knowing how to respond. And then one day he texted me this like really sweet text.

He was clearly trying to pursue me and pursue my heart. I was so annoyed. I was just like totally annoyed. I read the text and I was like, I have all these things to do.

I've got little ones hanging all over me. And now this is like something else on my to-do list to like respond to him. And I'm like, what am I supposed to be girlfriend again? And I found myself totally annoyed. And I remember putting the kids down for their nap and just being like, God, I honestly have no idea what to do with this because I am exhausted.

I really don't want to be a girlfriend today. And as I began to pray, the Lord reminded me of all the years that I had prayed that Jason would cherish me again, that he would come back, that he would change his heart for me. And now here he was the Lord answering that prayer and I'm totally annoyed. And as I began to pray and Jason had shared what the Lord had showed him in scripture and revelation, and I remember him telling me, the Lord is telling me to remember, and that word remember came to my mind as I was praying. And I felt like the Holy Spirit was like, you need to do that too.

You need to remember too. And I remember thinking, okay, what was it that allowed me to respond to that pursuit? And it came so naturally, like just what you said, Anne, like when you're dating, you don't even think about it. It's just the reaction of your heart.

Like you just do it. And the Lord showed me, it was gratitude. It was genuine gratitude.

I thought it was the best thing ever that Jason was pursuing me. I thought it was the most amazing thing that he cherished me. I was so grateful for all the little things that he did for me. And I took it in and I thought it was amazing. And the Lord showed me, start doing those things you did naturally, proactively. So I started to remember all the little things that Jason did and I started to really feel gratitude.

Like God helped me to really feel gratitude for that. So did it start out as an act of your will? Yes.

Kind of your deciding, I will. It was a choice. Yeah. I'm going to respond.

Yes. It was absolutely like a choice that I'm going to choose gratitude. And as I began to thank God for the things that Jason was doing, thank God for the way that he was pursuing me and God.

And as I began to do that, it's amazing. God gave all these amazing chemicals that are released through gratitude, dopamine and what is it? Oxytocin. That's the bonding chemical.

The bonding chemical. When you feel gratitude, you are bonded to the people that you're grateful for. And as I began to do that, I did begin to feel again what I did for Jason. And we are really big proponents of doing the same things that you did. For us, we always played country music. We had our songs. And so we began to play those songs again and we began to think about each other more and more throughout the day and just being really proactive and grateful and that really changed. Wow. The power of gratitude in marriage.

Yeah. I think your listeners would do well to recognize the power of gratitude. Psalm 100 verse 4 says, Enter my gates with thanksgiving and my courts with praise. If you want God's presence, which in the Old Testament, it was in the temple.

So the temple was surrounded by courts and the courts had gates around them. So if you wanted to get into the inner court, you start with thanksgiving and you move into praise. You thank God for what He's done and you praise Him for who He is and you end up with His presence and where His presence is, there's the power.

Since we're made in His image, the same thing is true about human beings. So Tori, her response was through gratitude. What she didn't realize is that was releasing hormones into her body of oxytocin, which is a bonding chemical and dopamine, which is the feel good chemical. So her body physically was responding in a way that was bonding to me through thanks and praise, like through gratitude for her recognizing, you know what, God, I'm so thankful that you're doing this inside of Jason and you know what, God, I'm thankful that Jason is a provider.

You know, I'm thankful. And then she started saying it to me, you're such a good provider. It's like that thanks and praise that's drawing me close to her.

It's drawing her close to me as I'm pursuing. And the next thing you know, we had that romantic flame back again. So if you, you know, if you're listening to this and you're struggling with maybe your husband or your wife or whatever, and you're not feeling that romantic flame again, I challenge you, remember what you used to feel about each other, repent for where you are right now.

And you're like, well, I don't think I did anything wrong. Well, but repentance is a change of mind. That's what repent means, metanoia. And then redo the things you did at first and then fuel it through gratitude and watch what God does inside your heart. I mean, that's beautiful.

It's so good. Here's my first thought, honestly, was I'm mad that, you know, we use that same passage, Revelation 2, in our vertical marriage book, but I didn't come up with the three R's. I'm like, dude, that is, I'm talking about redo and repent, but I'm like, that is just a simple, and I will, and I'll give you credit, but it's like, it's like, we do forget. We don't want to change.

I mean, it's usually the opposite of that. I don't, I don't remember. Yeah. Yeah.

And I don't want to change. It's her fault. Yeah.

It's never my fault. And then I don't want to redo it. And so you sort of get, you get a hard heart. Yes. Dig your heels in.

So the question for you guys would be, I mean, it's such a beautiful thing, even that your feelings were changed by praying. Yeah. I like the, you know, I like the dopamine hits, the oxytocin, you're, you're developing new neural pathways. So what were you saying?

Wait, wait, wait, I want to add this too, because some people are like, I don't even care if I'm a 10. I'm so tired. I've got a two-year-old, I've got a one-year-old and a four-year-old and nobody's sleeping. We barely talk. I can barely function. So be it a 10, my life is a three, basically. And my walk with Jesus is not doing well. And so they feel so discouraged and maybe they're struggling with depression or even anxiety.

So that 10 can feel overwhelming, like I can't get there. By the way, that was going to be my question. We're one. That's it? That is exactly what I wanted to ask you to respond to, the couple that just says, I don't have it. I don't even have the energy to go after it.

I don't care about it. So what do I do? And I would say that, that action precedes motivation. It's like when I woke up this morning, I was not motivated to get out of bed, but I got out of bed.

The next thing you know, five minutes later, I don't want to go back to bed. My action preceded my motivation. And what we're saying about remember, repent, redo, it's, it takes place in your mind. So pursuit is not just this, oh no, I have to go on four date nights in a row and I have to do this romantic. No, no, no.

Stop all that. Pursuit is changing the way you think. It's replacing the negative with the positive. It's remembering. That's, you know, you go read the scripture all throughout the scripture and I'm a real Bible nerd.

I think all your listeners need to recognize that if you're not a Bible nerd, you need to become one because it's got all the answers. But all throughout the scripture, we see God saying, remember, remember, remember why? Because remember is all about connection. My fingers are members of my palm. If one of them gets dismembered, I have to remember it.

I have to reconnect it. And so when we remember back to positive interactions with our spouse, what happens is we're reconnecting with them at a mental level. Everybody has energy for that. When you lay down at night and then you just allow yourself to think those positive thoughts. Then you're remembering that Satan, he's our accuser who makes accusations for our agreement. And those come in the forms of negative thinking, of negative thoughts. So when the negative thought comes in, I'm not going to buy into that.

I'm not going to agree with that. So I would say for them, just start in your mind with positive thinking. Yeah.

And I would say I have this little note card on my desk that says consistency compounds, right? Like little things that we do every day. I think it's so important to always ask, what do I want? Like what do you want?

I want a strong marriage. Well, there's just going to be little steps that you can take every day to get there. I was just talking to a younger mother the other day and she's in the middle of raising littles and she was just asking for some advice. And I was telling her about some songs that our kids used to listen to when they were little and they were scripture verses to songs. And she was trying to get her kids to memorize scripture. And I just remembered, I was talking to her about how for years and years, I felt like every little thing that I told my kids went in one ear and out the other. But it didn't stop me from talking to them about things. Even though it felt like it was getting absolutely nowhere, I kept on sharing scripture with them because that's what my parents did with me. And I knew that those were the things that were hidden in my heart that came to the surface when I needed them most. So that's what I was going to do with my kids. And yesterday, my oldest sent me an old song with one of those scripture verses from Steve Green.

And he sent it to his younger brother who's 16, he sent it to me and he said, I was thinking about this verse and I found the song. But it was, and I was just reminding her that it's just, you have to know what you want and you just make decisions every day. And you're not going to feel like we're not going to feel like we're at a 10, but we're making little steps every day to get there.

And so it's not like getting defeated because you don't feel it then. Yeah. Yeah. I know that when we were at that point that we talked about earlier in the car and Ann says I lost my feelings for you and that remember, repent, redo. One of the things that we had to redo is just start doing the things we did when we were dating. There you go.

Right. And one of the things when we were dating, we were still going on dates and I was prideful about it. I take my wife out every week. I get her away from the kids, but we didn't talk.

When we were dating, we were talking and mostly I was asking her questions because I loved her and wanted to pursue her. And I think one of the biggest things we have to help us understand and couples understand is to get the love back. You've got to take your eyes off of them because we think it's their fault. And I mean, people even say to us, well, you don't know my husband. It's like, no, no, no, you've got to get your eyes on you almost in a selfish way. I'm going to focus on me and say, what can I do to make this marriage better and do it?

And if they never change, they don't, but they are going to like you guys, you responded to that. Even him praying. And it's just like, that's where a couple has to go.

You know, it's interesting you say that. And it's so true because Dr. John Gottman, you know, foremost marriage psychologist, seven principles that make marriage work. He said the number one reason for divorce is contempt. And contempt isn't just negative thinking towards your spouse. It's negative thinking with comparison. Yeah. Better than you. Yeah.

And it's, it's, well, Tori did that. I never do that. And when you allow yourself to think like that, it leads to contempt. You know, we, we like to talk about conflict and how you need to learn how to bring a complaint rather than to make a criticism. You know, complaint is about behavior and it's, it's talks about how you feel.

Criticism is about identity and defines who they are. But unchecked criticism in the mind leads to contempt. And if you're feeling contempt towards your spouse, that's where we say, it's first remember then repent.

And you have to recognize any negative thinking towards your spouse. God isn't just your father. He's your father-in-law. You're thinking bad thoughts about his son or his daughter. That's a bad place to be. Are your sons married?

All of them. Right? Well, you have daughters-in-law. Well, you really want your daughters-in-law to think good thoughts about your son.

You know, if one of your daughters-in-law decides that she's going to blast all of his dirty laundry all over the place, you're going to have a problem with that, you know, because he's your son and she's your daughter-in-law. We have to treat God the exact same way. And so you're exactly right, Dave. And I applaud you for that. Although I do think Anne is the brains of the outfit. That was a very good point. She is.

Everything I know, I learned from her. You guys, thanks. Will you do me a favor? Will you pray for couples thinking there's people listening that are just like, I'm just, I need help. And Jesus is the best place that we can go. If you could get on your knees and put your hand on my shoulder, that'd be nice.

I'll keep it above the shoulder so you don't think I'm making a move. Lord, we love you. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Lord, that you've raised up Dave and Anne, who can help so many of us couples in marriage. Lord, we thank you for what you've done with marriage. We thank you that marriage was your idea.

We thank you that you made marriage a warring mechanism to keep Satan in his defeated state. So right now, I just pray for every couple who's listening to this. I pray right now for husbands that they would pursue their wives with all the gusto that they have. And I pray for wives that they would respond to their husbands. Lord, I pray for couples that you would just bless them wherever they are and whatever they're feeling, whatever they're going through right now, God, I pray for divine energy.

Lord, I thank you that the powerful marriage that you outline in the scripture is not between two people, but between three where you are there. And so, Lord, we thank you that you're a transformational God. So we rely on you for your transformational power.

For those couples out there that feel like, wow, I'm at a four, I don't know how I'm going to get to a 10. God, you come in and you bring transformation that only you can bring. God, I pray that we would do our part, that we would think the thoughts that we need to think, that we would honor scripture, the principles that we learn in the scripture, where we're supposed to do unto others as we would have them do unto us, and that we would do our part. And that God, that you would then come in and do your part where you bring the transformation. God, we pray in the same way that you transform a caterpillar into a butterfly, but it has to go through the cave of the cocoon.

Lord, some couples right now are in that cave. I pray, Jesus, in that moment, that in this moment right now that you would allow that metamorphosis, the transformation to take place in their heart, and that soon they'll find themselves having wings in their marriage again that they did not even experience before they got married, that it's so much better than anything that they could ever ask or imagine. You are that kind of God. You are a transformational God. So we pray that blessing and that protection and that anointing over marriages today, anyone who's within earshot of this program, God, that you would transform their relationships.

We're relying on you and we're trusting you, and we'll give you the praise, the glory, and the honor that is due to you and you alone. In Jesus' name. Amen. Amen. Amen.

Amen. Thanks. You're listening to Dave and Anne Wilson with Jason and Tori Benham on Family Life Today. Jason and Tori's book is called Beauty in Battle, Winning in Marriage by Waging a War.

You can pick up a copy at familylifetoday.com. Dave and Anne, along with Jason and Tori, have some great memories of their time at the Weekend to Remember Getaway. And just so you know, as you listen to them talk about it, if you register this week, you and your spouse can experience this incredible event for over 40 percent off. Okay, here's the Wilsons and the Benhams. I think the conference that impacted us the most two weeks before we got married was the Weekend to Remember Marriage Getaway, for sure.

We didn't listen to anything. I'm laughing because, yeah, we thought, we don't need this, why are all these people taking notes? We are in love with Jesus, we are in love with each other, more than anybody probably here is, and it won't be that hard. And then when we got married, we pulled that manual out, literally within three months and said, Oh my goodness, we are struggling. And all the truth we needed was right here in this manual, which is really the Word of God put in a manual, and it literally saved our marriage. And Tori and Jason, we just talked a little bit. So you guys think you've been to one?

Yes, in the first few months of our marriage. Okay. Dennis Rainey was the speaker. He was the speaker. I do vaguely remember this.

Dennis was our speaker as well. You know what I love though, is that if, you know, if I'm out hunting treasure, and somebody comes up and says, Hey, I got a map that can get you the treasure, then I need to do everything in my power to get that map. That's what I love about those weekends that you guys do, where you're like, Hey, we got a map that can help you have the marriage that you want. And I think every couple that's listening to this needs to seriously consider going to one of your weekends.

They're every weekend, there's a like a fall season, and then a winter spring season. And we have almost 60 couples that speak for them now. Wow. And there's two couples at each conference. But they're all over.

And it's the same conference with different presenters, same manual, same manual we went through 42 years ago has been updated. But the truth is still God's truth. And it's a map. I like that. That's what it is, Jason. It's a map to treasure. And most couples have no idea that God has a map, there is a treasure, and He's revealed it in His Word.

And that's why we had to go back to it. Can I just send Tori, because she's got some things she needs to work on. I'm the problem.

She's the problem. Make a new commitment to your marriage and see what God will do. You can head over to familylifetoday.com, scroll down and click on the Weekend to Remember link to find a location that works for you. Are you burning the candle from both ends, like totally at the end of your rope? Well, make sure you join us next week as Dave and Anne talk with Anne and Michael Swindell about finding God's unshakable peace in the midst of stress. That's next week. On behalf of Dave and Anne Wilson, I'm Shelby Abbott. We'll see you back next time for another edition of Family Life Today. Family Life Today is a production of Family Life, a crew ministry helping you pursue the relationships that matter most.