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Ways that Caregivers Process Heartache and Stress

Hope for the Caregiver / Peter Rosenberger
The Truth Network Radio
February 23, 2022 3:00 am

Ways that Caregivers Process Heartache and Stress

Hope for the Caregiver / Peter Rosenberger

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February 23, 2022 3:00 am

The stress and heartache has GOT to go someplace - how do you process it out as a caregiver? 

From our broadcast 2/19/2022.  Plus a song from Gracie. 

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Roseburg health care givers, caregivers, and goal of this program is to help you stay strong and healthy take care of someone who is not open to hope for the

If you'll indulge me for just a moment I've received quite a bit of mail over the last several weeks. This Gracie is going through her challenges and very meaningful things that people sent me. I want to give a big shout out to Dr. Dr. Robert Beeman, who in his later life. He said at this late stage of life taken us all right and he enclosed to him that he's written which is I will dwell in the house of the Lord, which is it's in both what were talking about today and I appreciate that. I sit on the piano and worked on this and a Mona continue to work on until I kinda make sure I can play it well and do do it justice and subducted Beeman. I'll give you some feedback on how I did with it and hopefully maybe we played on the on the show 11 morning and love to do it. Thank you for this. It gives a beautiful sheet music. You did a great job with that he got great. Yes, great cords in here. You know how like those cords to forgot you got some great short five cords of diminished cords and all kinds of things and so I will I will give it my best to work on this and will hopefully feature this on the program here in the not-too-distant future, also received another song from the Schroders Dale Schroeder sorry shocker shocker dear shocker skull. The Last Supper and you could tell that the put a lot of work into this and do the sheet music and I'm decent reader of sheet music record charts better but I'll I will give it my best shot. Dale and Suzanne and so bear with me and I'll try to work this up as well. I like to learn new music and go through it in this is this is a great piece. It obviously you've done a lot of work with and getting the sheet music out.

I'll see if I can do it justice. You did not put the cords on this.

I'm actually going to have to knuckle down and do the work and have to learn how to play golf. I can't cheat with the court process does knowing what I do is I just read the lead sheet with the courtyard and I can play pretty much any key and so forth. But if I have to actually sit down and seriously read the music and play it as written because us quite a bit distracting for me keep my piano teachers used to cost a lot of strain for them to was not much of a site reader and I never would.

It really was much of a reader when I can do it and I can write it out.

I mean, I majored in composition arranging degree music and so when I can do it, but you guys are making me work here and that's okay because I love it and I love to be able to work you have received so many high notes from folks who express their praying for me. Helen Meyer from Dallas, Texas. Thank you for the CD that you also sent evidently music really connects with this audience and I get more people who write me and tell me how much they appreciate me bringing the hymns back to the forefront and I and I really want to try to do that more and and if you have a special him that you like her.

So this important to you, please send it on and I think what I'll do. Also someone to try to feature regularly. Gracie or me, but I think Monday Gracie for a while on on on her music and play some songs of hers that you may not of heard you've heard a lot of in the buffer music and so forth. But some of the recordings that I think that you'll find meaningful as well.

And you know I've said this often.

Hans Christian Anderson use.

He once said when words fail.

Music speaks and I really believe that.

And obviously it speaks to you all and I can just play few bars of a particular him that you like that has been meaningful to you and it takes you back that point when you were sitting with your loved one or or at the funeral or when you were child being raised in this him something to you. These are these are treasured things for us to hold onto Luther Martin Luther often said that that music next to the word of God. Nothing expresses the soul more than music and and I really believe that and and surprisingly I'm at home if you know this or not Bock 200 years later was one of Luther's most avid pupils.

Even though each course never met a missed 200 years later, but Bock is considered the father of church music and the way he wrote his music was very much in line with order and an accomplishment and it's it's extraordinary and that he would sign it SDG SDG solo day. Gloria, one of the five pillars of the Reformation and all of church music has its roots in Bock and and and so if you go back and play some of these pieces that he wrote and you look at it in the way it flows in the.

The theology that he would put with the they wanted he did with with lyrics and and singers and so forth. It was it was extraordinary, and so the him know that we have in our churches is a sadly overlooked treasure of of comfort of strength and fortitude of great doctrine of assurance of all the wonderful things that sustain us during brutal journeys and yet it's often so overlooked, and that's a shame. It some people do these for sentimental reasons and I and I get that there's a lot of nostalgia with hymnals and with with the hymns of the church, but while I'm in Denver with Gracie.

I can't spend the night in hospital because a coma they don't let me do that and some friends of mine open up their home and knew these wonderful people when they were dating back in college we went to school together cleanly Bible college is now Columbia International University and I remember when they started dating back in the early 80's euros of notable longtime wonderful couple.

What we were all in it and acquire their that traveled from the University a call. The best require and Anita, who is also from South Carolina like I am. She sang alto Phil Singh base. I don't remember what I think using alto Phil Singh base Peter just tried to fit in there. I don't know what I say back but I was playing the piano at their home and Anita was using these great hymns and I'm looking forward to a Gracie be able to join us and the two of them blend together. I know that Anita went to visit Grace in the hospital the day I couldn't go and they sang together and but it but it reminded me of those times when I was in chapel back in cleanly Bible college in you had a thousand people seeking with gusto and imparts these wonderful hymns of the faith what what does that have to do with me to caregiver well for me.

It has a lot to do with being a caregiver, because I was asked recently. How do you grieve a friend asked me that. And I said I grieve at the piano and they said I will.

We had you on a playlist and you came up we were listening on a playlist on her phone and and you came up and they said to themselves this is a man who knows how to hurt you. Knows what hurt feels like the way a play and that's how I process out the things that I carry and the things that I have to observe is a caregiver. It's got a go someplace. Okay, it's got a go someplace and God's gracious mercy gave me the ability to to perform music and I don't know, maybe it's all part of the pie, but it's always part of the plan. I don't know another speculate on that. I just know that he provides us where he looked where he guides, he provides where he leaves he feeds in our souls need that and I look at friends about who are visual artists paint and I'm I'm stunned by what they do. The expression that they put in a look at friends about who garden and in they have these exquisite guards the way they planted it out affect those over it. Anita and Phil's house and had the beautiful Christmas cactus.

You know you and they were beautiful and she was so good with all the plants that I have.

I don't have a green thumb have a black that might kill plants used is really sad that I look at people who write poetry and am amazed on what they do with language, how they express themselves and then I look at people who do things with her half with woodworking and and and carpentry and I look at the things that they build an online or what.

What an extraordinary expression and uniform from everything I've seen people do tremendous works of art with what I would consider junk and they will make things that are exquisite and they just got this on my brother-in-law's. That way, my sister says that he can take things that I would just never figure this out in a million years, and he makes the most wonderful, beautiful things there.

If you go to my sister's home at munitions like my kindness and everything he does is just mind blowing it. I don't have the words and so I think that in all of us.

We have the ability to process out what were feeling in various ways and his caregivers. I cannot stress enough the importance of that what you do. How do you process this out.

I understand the grief that you carry is a caregiver.

What do you do the process this out.

What what is demanding that come out if you and how do you express it in a way that is soul satisfying to you, but I would really like to hear that so many of you all of express music.

I get a lot of people calling know the they played the piano or the guitar or flute or whatever and and and there's so many musicians but I'd like to hear from others as well. There people that restore cars that I look at these older cars of my friend Stevens at waiting and and he restored 1983 Mercedes sedan.

I don't like how did you do all this. How did you learn this and any likes to do it and and and so I think his caregivers. Those those places that we can go and express our hearts, however, that looks to work out the kinks in our souls are so important for me it's music. That's why talk about it because I can't do the things that other people do and and I am grateful that I have a place to do it. I'd like to hear what yours is hope for the you can go out there. There's informing philatelic what you hope for the caregiver, take a quick break.

This is the program was an Peter Rosenberg at about 3 1/2 decades as a caregiver. I've spent my share of nights in the hospital sleeping in waiting rooms on foldout cot shares. Even the floor sometimes on sofas and a few times in the doghouse. But let's still talk about that as caregivers we have to sleep in uncomfortable places, but we don't have to be miserable. We use pillows for my these things are great. They have a patented interlocking feel that adjusting your individual sleep needs and for caregivers. Try to sleep in all the different places we have to sleep leave me our needs get ripped up significantly. Think about how clean your pillows are in the covert world were all fanatical about cleaning. Can you wash your pillows with my pillows for my if we throw in the washer and dryer. We do it all the time 10 year warranty guarantee not to go flat 60 day moneyback guarantee made in the USA is a caregiver you need rest.

I going to my type in the promo code caregiver you get 50% off the four pack which includes two premium pillows and to go anywhere, pillows also receive a discount on anything else on the website. When using your promo code caregiver is my promo code caregiver. If you ever talk to your wife's wheelchair just to see if it would work. The problem with it like redneck that you're not making you I have footage I hear you podcast very well over 600 largest podcast caregivers world and find a variety things. Sometimes I do these little your caregiver minutes to hear that and that that's exactly what they are just, you know minute to talk about a thought that I had of something that helps me in the moment and my audiobook is available as well and so was the print version converts all the Stuff. Please take advantage of this. I really recommend audiobook a lot because sometimes it's good just to be able to hear a voice that speaks in your language and I do speak fluent caregiver got a call from a guy this week in San Antonio looking for support group down there and ask if I could recommend one will I don't know any.

That's kind of the problem were having around you know for caregivers is that we don't have those kinds of places for us.

We have support groups for various diseases and things such as that in and in all but but when it comes to just support group for caregivers. I started one out here where we live and we meet every week you have a great group and it's all about building this up his family caregivers. It's not about caregiving.

I'm not here.

Through this program work through anything else I do to get into the task of caregiving. I'm going to have to learn some things we need training. A lot of us particular deal with ongoing medical issues like I do. And like this German from San Antonio's wife has a bunch of stomach issues and so forth that gastro issues that require nursing type here. So as we have to get that, training. But when it comes to support group. It's not about training in that sense to learn a task it's about taking a moment to catch your breath, building ourselves up so that we can have the fortitude to endure this and so that's what this program is this what podcast is this what books are everything I can do to help settle our hearts down, not just yours mine.

I have to read my own book I have to listen to the home show my sister when I was in the hospital Gracie she said hey look, these are your words. You gotta embarrassing, but the truth of it is is that I have caregiver amnesia and and I got reminded of the sink. I have gospel amnesia have to be reminded of the great redeeming love of Christ, each and every day we all do, and if our heart is a train wreck.

What kind of caregiving are we going to do you think about that. So the point of all that I'm try to do on this program.

Recognizing that there are support groups out there for us is to provide a place where you can come in here in your own language as a caregiver. Things that help settle you down today point you to safety help you take a knee if you have to take a break and develop a better way to live a healthier life of not here to help you or me get happy. Okay.

Happiness is is an elusive goal that the world throws at it.

We would feel good all the time when you and I both know that's likely to happen when you're in the caregiving journey you going to have trauma and drama on a regular basis so the goal can be to be happy as long as you're dealing with regular trauma and drama. The goal can be to be healthy. Healthy emotionally, physically, fiscally financially, spiritually relationship was professionally all those things that help us better handle the tremendous challenges that we face as caregivers and it's going to come out of nowhere sometimes go to just disclose just hit us out of the blue and so what I try to do is is all for things that I've learned I try to stay away from opinion because my opinion is worthless.

My experience is not, and if you think about it, that's really a biblical principle think that was his revelation. They overcame by the blood of the lamb and the word of their testimony, not the word of their opinion. I don't need other people's opinion. II consult trained professionals about the logistics of certain things with Gracie but I don't need their opinion as far as how to do this and this and this is caregiver. What I need to hear is for people who've done it. What they've learned and the pitfalls that I can avoid and how to pick myself back up. You know when I do fall in what strengthens me.

What helps clear my head so that I'm I can make clear decisions, better decisions, clarity of thought is is critical for us as caregivers. How many of you will feel like your thoughts are clear and how many you see how easy it is for them to become muddied up on me dislike it takes no time at all for our minds just in two freak out and it usually fear obligation and guilt. The fog of caregiver so you hear me pound that a lot because that's where we live is caregivers. I wanted to in the show today with with us all from Gracie for the message. You know what to play you one of her just the whole song on show casino. There, people haven't heard a lot of these things so that well okay I'll do that and see if you like. This is one that that she recorded a while back and I just love it I love the cords arrangement. Everything about it and it's written by Keith Green and it is one of the unit will favorite songs of here is always liked it.

I brought it to Gracie as it would you like to sing this sheet should really connected with it as you hear so this is my wife Gracie she's going in the show today so thank you all very much for being a part of this.

Thank you for your continued prayer for recovery if she goes through this very difficult challenge in her life and thank you for your flexibility with me. This is my wife, Gracie, and if you want to see more about you go out to help the All the pain and will no some of you know the remarkable story of Peter's wife Gracie and recently Peter talk to Gracie about all the wonderful things that emerge from her difficult journey. Take a listen Gracie.

When you envision doing a prosthetic limb outreach.

Did you ever think the inmates would help you do that, not in a million years.

When you go to the facility run by core civic and you see the faces of these inmates that are working on prosthetic limbs that you helped collect from all of the country that you put out the plea for and their disassembly sell these legs like what you have your own prosody and arms and orange everything when you see all this makes me cry because I see this miles on their faces and I know what it is like someplace where you can't get out without somebody else allowing you to get out the hospital. These men are so glad that they get to be doing is one thing said something good with my did you know before you became an amputated parts of prosthetic limbs could be recycled and had no idea I thought Peg leg.

I thought a wooden legs. I never thought of titanium and carbon lags and flex the sea legs and all that.

I never thought about. As you watch these inmates participate in something like this, knowing that there there helping other people available providing the means for the supplies to get over there. What is it do to you. Just on the heart level. I wish I could explain to the world. What I see in here and I wish that I can able to come and say the this guy right here in East Africa with that. I never not feel that way out every time you know you always make me have to leave. I don't want to leave.

I feel like I'm at home with them and I feel like that we have a common bond that would never expect that only God could put together. Now that you could experience with it what you think of the faith-based programs.

The core civic offers. I think there is absolutely awesome and I think every prisoner out there have faith-based programs because he return right at the men that are involved in this particular faith-based program and other ones like it, but I know about this one car is amazingly great care has I think that that is me just has something to do with God is broken help. You want to donate and use prosthetic limb, whether from a loved one who passed away or you know somebody well-groomed you donated some of your own for the haven't out of the please go to staining gain. We

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