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November 17, 2021 12:00 am
Welcome to the intense podcast with Charles Stanley Wednesday, November 17. You'll learn how to connect with God in a way that will not aspire soon be encouraged as you listen to leasing our loneliness.
Loneliness is a very painful emotion and yet a lot of people who live in the painful emotion don't even understand really what it is that they're feeling, loneliness is not a sin, but God does not want you and me living in that state, because as we've said often times what it may lead to what oftentimes go sleep to think about it as we said past message. That is, every aspect of life in every occupation doesn't make and it was one of those people can feel you can be the president. You can be somewhere down the line you can be a homemaker you can be a kid in school and college away loneliness doesn't pick people. Loneliness is out there for anybody to experience and the reason it become so painful is because God didn't make us to live that way. He made us to live in a sense of togetherness and attached naturally.
First of all with him primarily. So how do we overcome it. Well the first one is this you have to recognize that your loan many people are lonely, don't recognize it.
They think it's something else, and oftentimes people will blame someone else or some other circumstance in life before they will admit to the fact I am a very lonely person because to admit loneliness is assigned to many people of weakness. It's a sign of common adequate is the sense something is missing in my life I don't I'm not the kind of person who's worth having friends, nobody really desires me and so other personal use or do they take all of those feelings of being alienated and ostracized and separated undesired, unwanted, and so they think will if I feel that way than if I were to say that somebody would think will you know maybe that's who he is.
Me, that's who she is and so oftentimes we don't face it until your face, loneliness, and are willing to admit the fact. Yes, I will only then you will never overcome it. The second point is this and that is reconciliation with God. You will never have true genuine peace and absence of loneliness until first of all, Jesus Christ get you connected to the father when a person recognizes their sinfulness recognizes that Jesus Christ is the only way to be forgiven, cleansed of our sin that all of our transgressions are wiped out all their past sins are forgiven, past, present and future, and now we have a personal relationship to him. How does that happen. It happens through accepting Jesus Christ as their personal savior.
He is the great connector.
He is the one who overcomes this disconnection. He's the one who listen who eliminates this alienated feeling that we have. He brings us into oneness with him. If there is no reconciliation to your create door to your heavenly father that the God who made you and loves you unconditionally. You will never escape it is a vital part reconciliation is a second step in this other and that is to recall the promises of God. It is a powerful thing in times of loneliness to cry out to and to recall what he said in his what he said.
He said that he would never leave us nor forsake us. You sold with your how I feel has gotten to do with it what you have to ask is, what did he say we have this awesome opportunity to call upon him, and to recall those promises.
And there's nothing I believe in the stronger. There is no quicker way to come out of that feeling of loneliness than to recall the promise of God and telling God his what you said you cannot lie I'm trusting you for what you said. I'm claiming that in Jesus name.
You think God's going to ignore that one his children never recall his promises. Now what does that mean that means you have to have an arsenal and that is you. You gotta have some ammunition and you see his promises are our ammunition against Satan's lies. Satan's going to say all you know what is his preacher talk you just forget that. No, that's work, God's words will and so we all need our arsenal because the Bible says we are soldiers and we are in the warfare and if you have an arsenal that means got lots of ammunition and that is your prepared. If you only have the 23rd Psalm are you midweek you may have one bullet that won't cut it.
You are not dealing with Satan who has an arsenal of foundry arrows. He says the causes that doubt God whenever he fires one router far back. He said I will never leave you nor forsake you. Nothing can separate me from the love of God. Christ Jesus is living on the inside of me. I may feel lonely but thank God, not it's amazing how that feeling of disconnection is what happened.
Is it basically said it's it's this disconnected feeling we have this is separation anxiety of what's going to happen, but when I began to affirm that he's living on the inside of me and I'm his child and his love for me is unconditional. You know what I get out of that feeling alone is and sent me will never come back.
No, but if admit means this if I learn to practice these points you will overcome loneliness so samosas well okay that's number three. Now what about some of those others in I have. I do have a few verses down in the I've been thinking about it and I'm really listening but you just don't have feel. Remember this everybody's got a feeling it's what you have to do is listen. You have to decide what you going to go by what you feel, what you know and so listen, the basis of our proper feeling is I am a reconciled child of God loves me enough to live on the inside as the basis of it that Mike and Michael live out the promise of he's give me yes I am that I'm on my way to overcoming these feelings and these experiences of loneliness now there's another very important point here.
If I'm going overcome loneliness. I got to reach out. Listen reach out and develop relationships and that's what God wants us to do.
Now there's a couple of very important things here that I want us to remember because oftentimes we can make a mistake at this point when it comes to reaching out to the develop new relationships that will essay two things that two cautions. First of all, not just reach out to develop a relationship but to reach out to develop godly relationships. You can find relationships or what kind what kind of relationships and so you have to be careful what kind of relationships you want to connect with kind of people you want in your life and so somebody says, but you know I'm so desperate.
It won't make a difference who it is. Yes, it will and makes a great deal of difference in I can remember some things and people have said to me over the years about what they did because they were so lonely and how they got into relationships. Listen carefully to some things you must never forget when you enter into an un-godly relationship. Your loneliness is going to get worse.
Why, because when you enter into an ungodly relationship which you gonna do is you gonna bend it back off from what you know is right get into relationship with somebody who promises it appears to meet your need.
I will remind you of something that is not a man on earth not a man on earth. And Jesus was in merits of his exclusion other man on earth who's ever lived who can meet all of the woman's needs.
Amen. Latest strike down the other hand, listen, there's not a woman on earth who can meet all of the man's needs. Amen. So what is that mean here's what it means don't try the impossible, because that's not the way God intended for us to live. Now watch this. We are to choose godly relationships because it's a safe thing that if samosas will not like what will think about this.
You want to choose somebody who knows. Watch this carefully.
Who knows, the same Jesus, you know y'all have the most important thing in common. Right there so listen, if you're connected to him and he or she is connected to him than fantastic.
You got a great connection then you can build up each other know what kind of person do you want so if I would ask you today will what would you look for in a person. If you wanted to start out the building relationship. Listen, you want somebody you can laugh with right somebody you have fun with the God they remember, throw that in extra caution somebody you can laugh with somebody you can pray with right somebody who will understand you think about it somebody who somebody who will understand you. Somebody you can share secrets with, that's rather bitter begotten somebody you can share secrets with somebody you can trust you looking for godly relationships. That's the kind of people you want. It's kind of friend you want.
You know when you have that kind of connection you had a hold on the because you found the right thing the right person now, so caution number one is yet to be careful what kind of relationships you build but there's a second, very, very important, caution is very important because this is a mistake people make seek to build a relationship that's an extension of God's presence and not a replacement for not explained that once this carefully. This person is not somebody that you've chosen your life so that you don't need God. Now you got them or you come along in your Christian but the truth is you found this person and it's not that it's not that you don't believe got and avoid.
It's just that all of a sudden this person is replacing got your life to filling up your life.
I watch this carefully destined for disaster. Watch this. When a person becomes so attached to another person and they begin to clean and lean and suck it out of you. There was after while what happens.
The other person because the back off and so God doesn't intend for us to the drain someone else but to build them up and not to just cover them up and smother them but to be the kind of friend that we talked about because here's what happens when a person does that, and they began to be co-dependent upon another person you not, depending upon God. Those relationships are no good. You find somebody for example, you think you're in love and she does so, he just thinks that there's nothing the world like you and the next thing you know all of life just revolves around that person than a sarong situation wrong relationship for the simple reason God doesn't want us codependent upon anybody and the truth is, those relationships don't last as a world but supposing it. Nevertheless, not necessarily you know what what was in the beginning. No man can meet all of the woman's needs and no one can meet all of the man's needs.
Only God can meet all of our needs. You say will what about people who are not American. God made all their needs. Yes, people who are married and he made all the needs. Yes what you don't want is a relationship where let's say for example that you're the one they're leaning on. They have these expectations, you can't meet.
You can't be there all the time. You can't answer all their emotional needs. Only God can do that. That's what has to be a healthy good godly relationship.
Well, let's think about this if you get into the town relationship.
What should you do well, you should gently back off. You may have to say you know what I don't ever want to stand between you and God.
And somehow I think in a relationship. Maybe I've gotten in the way that may be very difficult, but I can tell you this if you don't deal with it you going to have to deal with it in a more painful way where you feel more alienation, more aloneness and all the rest you and I cannot meet everybody's need or anybody all their needs and so we have to be careful when we build relationships that we build ungodly the kind of person we are talking about and I have expectations of them that are absolutely impossible.
So let's think about one last thing, and that simpler this and that is to refocus. That is when you feel lonely, then refocus your attention. What do you feel when you're feeling lonely somebody do something for me. That is if I'm feeling lonely on the center of attention.
I want somebody to think about me somebody to do something for me.
Some of the meet my need now if you want to stay in the pit of loneliness. Leaders keep filling out a way that you can refocus that every single one of these points is important. Refocusing what you mean by that simpler this and that is refocus your attention from yourself and ask yourself how can I do something for someone else when you refocus you get your mind off yourself and you get it on someone else and think about the church. For example, people say why don't go to church.
I watch TV and you never going to hear me to tell people in television stay at home watching touch, though there may be people who cannot get to a church that people are sick you can get other people live in places that there's no church was but a few places like that.
Understand that. But listen. The fellowship of the church is very important. Listen to what the apostle Paul said he said in his epistles to the church.
He said, and in different epistles. He said, except one another. He said Ed Manes one another.
He said bear each other's burdens on Martinsburg build up one another, be kind to one another. He said comfort one another. He said devote yourselves to one another. He said encourage one another love one another stimulate one another words he just went on and on and on one another one of what is he talking about. He's talking about a relationship if I'm going to encourage you. I'm having a relationship with the that's going to be positive. If I am devoted to you. That means I am.
I'm going to help your way I can. If I'm in a build you up, I will be up have a positive influence if I admonish you for something it's because I care if I'm comforting you and because what I want you to see his every single one of those one others have to do with the relationship so that if I'm lonely. One of the wisest things I can do is to get in that one. Another job encourage somebody else build them up, lift them up, give them something provide the words, whatever it might be.
Is this self-centeredness that just feeds and loneliness. So how do we get out of that we choose by an act of our will in the deepest moments of loneliness who cannot help who cannot encourage who cannot talk to it not for myself but who can I relate to, who can I give myself away to in a godly fashion. You don't have to live in loneliness. I watch this. This is like taking a capsule, one Sue doesn't usually cure anything.
These are five points to a message every one of them is important, but you have to practice it. You think Satan just going to fold up and leave and say well they got the victory, forget them all know he's going to attack you and remember what we said number three is recalling his promises. Get your Arsenal out its ammunition is what God said is what you sits in his what God said.
He said he never leave me enough excitement.
He says he's living inside of me, since he's my God, and he says that he loves me and nothing will be able to separate you have to practice I was that again. If the put it to practice and you put into practice. God will bring you out on the slough of loneliness and lightning doesn't think you really think you basing our loneliness.
If you'd like to know more about child family in touch ministries intense tantalizing after the presentation of intent ministries Atlanta, Georgia