Boot Camp Follow-Up After Hours

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Call 866-WINASIA or to see chickens and other animals to donate, go to CritterCampaign.org. Hey, this is Mike Zwick from If Not For God Podcast, our show. Stories of hopelessness turned into hope. Your chosen Truth Network podcast is starting in just seconds. Enjoy it, share it. But most of all, thank you for listening and for choosing the Truth Podcast Network. This is the Truth Network. Coming to you from an entrenched barricade deep in the heart of central North Carolina, Masculine Journey After Hours, a time to go deeper and be more transparent on the topic covered on this week's broadcast.

So sit back and join us on this adventure. The Masculine Journey After Hours starts here now. Welcome to the Masculine Journey After Hours, and maybe, and we hope, you listened to our previous shows before the boot camp, which were Interview with God and Interview with God Part Drew. It won't end, Andy. So if you just listened to the broadcast, or you know that this week's topic has been, you know, simply how was that Interview with God that we had before the boot camp, how did God come after those things, and so along those lines, all I can say is, Drew!

We left our hero Andy slash Drew. This isn't Christian Carter Theater, right? No, it was not. But you know, I thought about what you said later, you know, when you said that I went all pasty Jesus. And that was the voice.

That's right. But anyway, you were sharing about the gifts that God had given you, and it was a beautiful picture. I just, you know, melded my heart. So yeah, let me back up when I said it a little bit on the radio show, but so God has had me on a journey, I mean, through the masculine journey, I feel like, you know, there's, it's a process, and I feel like I've had my wound dealt with a lot.

I'm sure there's more out there, but the major wound, I think, was dealt with, and got my new name. That identity really meant a lot to me, but you know, the last couple of years, I just feel like I've really experienced the adoption of the Father, and to the point to where my idea of him has changed. He's no longer the Old Testament God that, you know, I mean, he brings justice. He brings truth. But he's, it says in the Gospels, it says in John 14, if you've seen me, you've seen the Father. So we've disconnected Jesus. Jesus is good cop, and God is bad cop. And that's not the case. He's just there as merciful. Are you messing with my car business now, Jesus?

That's true. I believe I am. But anyway, I just have had a burden, not a burden, just a sense of seeking God and looking to him as my Father. And I didn't realize the wound that I had was an orphan spirit, and it came from my dad leaving the state when I was around 13, very impressionable time, 13 to 20 some.

I mean, all that time, really. I really didn't have him consistently in my life the rest of my life. I mean, I had a great relationship with him.

But anyway, there was that orphan feeling of not having him. But before my dad left the state, he knew my heart would need something, and he took me on a road trip all around North Carolina and South Carolina. And we hit Grandfather Mountain, and then we went to Brevard and to the waterfalls, and then we went to Wilmington and to the Battleship North Carolina. And all those made an impression on me, and I always remembered those. But I didn't realize until I started really digging into this recently that that was, that he had done a lot for my heart then. Well, fast forward to two or three years ago, probably four years ago, I got hired at a company, did a lot more travel.

I always liked the traveling adventure. And I felt like God was just saying, take me on these. Or maybe I thought I was taking him.

God, let's do this. I've heard that you go on these road trips. And I consciously did it and really focused on God during these times. And I felt like he was speaking to me different times, but it was more of just a presence.

But last year, about June, I went to Yosemite National Park in California, loved that place, been there two or three times. And when I was there, I mean, I just had that focus and just felt his presence the whole time. And it was really cool gifts that he gave me. And again, I'm not seeking these gifts.

I'm seeking his presence. But God loves to give gifts, and I wouldn't even think about this, but this comes from Eldridge and them stuff. I mean, Eldridge is talking about seeing a heart. He sees hearts and everything. He saw a heart in a cow patty.

If you can see God in that or whatever, if he's receiving that as a gift, I can receive what I receive. So one of the first things, I'd seen this documentary on this pollen explosion that happens in these pine trees all at the same time. I saw it on the documentary. I take this hike up in Yosemite. I get to a certain point, and the valley is clear and all that. All of a sudden, this pollen releases. I'm like, what the heck? I know what that is. It just found out about it. And it was like it was there for me. And it's only a temporary thing.

It doesn't just continue on or whatever. And it was right in the spot. I had a perfect view of it.

Wow, God, that's awesome. I walk down, and I go get back from that hike, and I'm going across the meadow, and I'm walking under this tree, and this bird is going nutso. And I don't know if I'm getting close to his nest or whatever, but he just keeps hovering over me. And I put all this on video and used it in my talk so you guys can corroborate it. But it was really cool, and you probably don't get the full impact of what the experience was from the video. But when I was at it, it was like, man, leave me alone, dude.

I mean, he was all over me. And then the final thing was I took a drive up on top to look down in the valley. And when I got up there, I'm driving this Dodge Challenger.

This is June. I got in this hailstorm that looked like a snowstorm. And I love storms, and I love that feeling of being in something that's...

There's a little bit of risk there, but it's not enough for me to kill myself. And it was just really cool, and I felt like those three gifts paralleled the three gifts my dad gave me. And just wanted to testify. I know it sounds weird, but I mean, God is in the weird.

You know, I think Morgan says that, right? He so is. And making the correlation to the gifts that your father gave that, hey, I was right there with you.

Yeah, with you. He was, he was. That's beautiful. Thanks. So Rodney... Robby. Rodney. We're doing this again.

Your turn. So take us back to, you know, I remember on the podcast, you said it so well. Like, you guys sprung this on me, like, you know, an hour before I was supposed to be... We did even better this time.

You didn't even get it till you... Yeah, I had no idea. We like spontaneous. We don't like to, you know, just have things that you can practice. Yeah, I show up for the radio show, and they're like, well, did you send in the clip? I said, no, I didn't send in the clip. I have no idea what the topic is that we're going to be talking about. And they're like, you didn't get the text? No, but I get text about people laughed at image, and I don't have any image in the texturing at all, and things like that. So, you know, it's, it is what it is.

Your smartphone needs, you know, input, IQ change, something. Yeah, probably stepped on. Yeah.

Crushed. But, so yes, what the father had for me going in was specifically contentment, and he had also been working on me with forgiveness, and specifically forgiveness for my wife and our relationship, and forgiveness in me and our relationship, and trying to express that and be content in that, and trusting in him. And so, you know, there's a lot of things that were going on working up and leading into the boot camp. And then at boot camp, I was asked prior to boot camp to respond to two different talks, which I was able to draw just, you know, I was like, okay, God, what do we have?

How am I going to respond? Because, you know, I was basically clueless. I didn't know what I was going to talk about. But again, he brought that whole forgiveness, contentment piece of it, and was able to continue that story through the two responses. And then I didn't know this until, you know, we were at camp, and it was already started, and then Jim's like, hey, can you also respond to his talk?

So I ended up responding to three. And just God gave me so much to talk about and portray of my personal story in those three talks that dealt with, yes, there's a lot of forgiveness that you have to be doing in your life. You know, you need to step that up. And the fact that you need to be content in all this and not get all worried and jacked up about how you feel and what's going on.

But just trust me. It takes me back to a story from my childhood where, you know, in a moment that, you know, could be very, very scary and wild and frightful, that it was like, now all I remember is complete contentment and happiness and joy in that moment because my trust was not in me. Well, take us back to that moment. What was going on? My dad was pulling me around town behind the pickup truck because it was just snowed and there was a bunch of packed snow. And this is back in the 70s and, you know, there's just huge snows and he's driving around town. He pulled me behind the truck and I'm flying around corners and there's snow, you know, kicking up in my face from the tires, back tires. So there's all kinds of things to hit, curbs, trees, poles, not to mention of the cars, you know, driving around.

So I'm all in this and all I get is complete joy. And he's like, you know, that's where he reminded me, you are my beloved son and who I'm well pleased and you have what it takes. Look, you went and did this when you were five and you just loved it and you were entering into that and you had all that danger and you had no apprehension at all because I had complete trust and faith in my father. And he's like, I'm assuming your mom wasn't in the truck. I don't even know if mom ever even knew about this or if she did because I don't remember that part of it being there. But I got a feeling she'd been fine with it. She was usually pretty good about those things.

She didn't mind too much, especially when I did a lot of stupid human tricks. So we go into camp and he prepares me in these talks and he just keeps showing me how when you trust in me, you enter in, you take the battle to the enemy and you go fight appropriately and try to instead of, you know, that's where the two talks that ended up jumping out at me the most was Andy's sonship and Jim's beauty to rescue. The other ones that I responded to got my thoughts in the right place, but the ones that kind of surprised me and brought more out than normally have before were those two. And the sonship one has always been so important because, again, when I really deeply think about who am I, I am a child of God. And when I think of that, it just melts my heart. It's just like, oh, my gosh, thank you, Lord. You know, I can't think of how to be thankful enough for that. And then the beauty to rescue was something that I think it was just kind of meant to be because it wasn't brought on me until, you know, a day before the talk.

And I'm like, OK, well, what do you have for me? And it was able to weave a bunch of things together in my own life, which I shared most of that in the responses and to come out on that in the backside in the middle of, OK, Rodney, yes, you're in warfare, but you need to be content. And I was every time something small would happen, I just I've been very good at being able to be reminded by God that, oh, be content, whether it's been at work, whether it was I broke my fishing pole while I was there, you know, I was like, well, just be content, don't get all ticked off about this, you know, no big deal. The little small things that would happen is like be content, whatever warfare was happening, be content. And it has been good for my heart.

The election happened at the same time. You know, there's Covid ramping back up. And now I read something about, oh, we're going to wear a mask in our own home. I'm like, this is getting to be really crazy. You know, it's like be content, be content. It's OK. And that is a great place to be with God. Which is where Belshazzar.

Now, let's just go with Mr. and Mrs. Conehead. Yeah, OK. Is the light keeping you awake? No. Your breathing has become erratic.

A torque for your thoughts. Beldar, are you content with me? Of course.

Why would I not be? Now, I would like to enter my slar phase. Let us suppose for some reason my life function ceased. What would you do? I would incinerate your carcass in the tradition of Ovidar the Obtuse and put it in a clean, dry place. Would you find a new Janeto mate to bring to our Gus chamber and propagate?

Ah, my most precious one. I would collapse. I would draw the shades and I would live in the dark. I would never get out of my slar pad nor clean myself. My fluids would coagulate, my cone would shrivel and I would die, miserable and lonely.

The stench would be great. Well, Beldar, you have made me very happy. Yes, I know.

Good night. Life on Earth is good. I agree. Stability and contentment have been achieved. Stability and contentment, Robby. That is what it is all about.

So that is amazing. So, Sam, you have been hanging on the phone, penny for your, or a coin head, whatever coin for your thoughts here. Well, my thoughts were Rodney responded to three talks and got a lot out of two of them.

That just left mine. Thank you, Rodney. It is all about you, Sam. It is all about you. Sounds like his podcast there, buddy. Yeah, yeah.

It is all good. No, it is just amazing just listening to what God has done, you know. Even as well as we know each other, just hearing the breakthroughs that people are getting is amazing.

Yeah, it is really remarkable. Well, I have to say, honestly, that I have never prepared for a boot camp like I prepared for this particular one. Nor had I ever been, felt like being thwarted like I was in this particular, because, you know, as I told everybody, I wanted to break this agreement that I couldn't play in public my guitar. And I wanted to take that guitar from underneath the bed that had been there for 30 years and not only break the agreement that I couldn't play in public, but I literally wanted to play the song, Classical Gas, which I had wanted to play, you know, as a young guitar student, you know, in the 69 when it originally came out. And to try it several times and failed and made several agreements that I will never be able to play this. And so not only did I want to break the one agreement, I wanted to break another agreement. And some of the thwarting that went on very early was, oh, you're 65 years old and you have arthritis in your hands.

And so, like, oh my gosh, it hurts to play. And so I'm trying to think of the stuff I drink every day now to make that better. Turmeric. Turmeric, right. So I just make turmeric tea, which everybody just grosses out when they watch me drink it because I just put a spoon of the stuff in water and just drink it now.

There's nothing to it because I'm just used to the taste. But so that really helped with me with my arthritis. And then, you know, the next major thing that happened was I was going to trim my bushes and I managed to mangle my little finger on my left hand, which if you watch somebody play Classical Gas on YouTube, you'll note that their little finger is all over the place. And that seemed like it was going to be the end of the story, but that's really when the story kind of got fun. I mean, it was like, no, the Holy Spirit said, you know, I always could be like Bluto on the couch, you know, oh, Bluto, you're going to make this the worst night of your life. But no, I mean, once I listened to it, I said, no, we're going to make this the best time because I'm going to show you that it can be done.

It can be done with three fingers. And, you know, that was that. Well, the next thing, you know, I got infection in my leg, I got diverticulitis. In other words, everything seemed like physically was going hard. You know, what Darren had gone through last fall. And then, you know, just to make it more interesting, I was going to really tune up my guitar and put on some new, you know, nylon strings so it could just sound like Classical Gas like Mason Williams.

It was going to be awesome. Except when I put those strings on, it broke the upper bridge that's called the nut on a guitar. And so I lost one of my 12 strings. So I've lost a finger.

I've lost a string. And, you know, I'm working on these talks. And the one talk that I had was an adventure to live.

And we talked about specifically that the way that you can triangulate your position with where your calling may be and those callings are all over the place are between desire and validation and risk. Well, we had the risk going because now I'm going to try to play this on an 11-string guitar with, you know, nine fingers. I certainly could feel God's pleasure because he was with me.

He was right there with me. And really, really, I desired to play that song so bad. I made several recordings of it. I would listen to it all my way home.

I would practice, you know, an hour, sometimes four hours. And, you know, my wife had heard this song over and it wasn't like I played 20 different songs, okay? If you can imagine for four hours playing one song and my wife says to me, you know, I hear that song in my sleep. And I was like, oh, I'm so sorry.

And she goes, no, I love it. There's something very, it's in an A minor key and there's something that's good for your soul when you play the thing. So it had been this desire grew and it grew. But the risk grew along with it. But I could feel the validation and away we go. So we get to camp, right? Yeah. And it didn't stop.

I mean, not even close. I mean, the day before I was to play the song, I go to tune the A string, which is the second to the last string, and the tuner breaks. Like, I can't play this song without, I mean, it's a major one of the strings. This isn't one I could do without like the other string. And then I thought, wait a minute, I got the tuner from the string that broke. So I took that tuner off with the help of many people that would help me, you know, get this thing tuned and away we would go. And so, you know, it was coming up to be time to do this.

You know, all this preparation had gone into it. And, you know, 35, 40 minutes before the talk, I get into an altercation with another member of the team. And the way that it works for me personally is if I get tight, right, which is this is on me, okay? Like, it's me that gets tight. And if I'm the one that's tight and I can't play because I'm tight, then I felt like a caged animal. I mean, I really did. Like, I can't go on there and do this because I literally can't play and what am I going to do because I can't go on there? You know, and it was just like I tried, you know, so hard. And so I'd literally blow up and leave the camp, right?

All my brothers dropped the ball totally on them. And, you know, I'm about, you know, I get back to Reedsville actually in about this time. You know, I get this text from Sam, call me. And it was, you know, it wasn't a text where I sensed he was mad. I got a sense like he was coming after my heart. So I was like, okay, I'll call Sam.

And it didn't take him a whole lot to get – did it, Sam? Take a lot to – No, I just said, Robby, I really would like for you to come back. I need for you to come back. You know, like, I'm on my way.

So I turned around and came back and they had put off the talk that night that you're going to play the next morning, right? Well, my head is all over the place and I am not in a good place. And Satan, you know, he had a foothold, Sam.

And he was whacking on me, but good. And, you know, here I am, I'm tight. I can't play if I'm tight. And I don't know how I'm going to do this because the talk was something I felt like I could do whether I was tight or wasn't tight. But play the guitar, that wasn't going to happen.

It just couldn't, you know. And so, you know, I'm trying to figure out why – how I can get my head straight, what I can do. And I'm praying and praying and praying, God, come for me, come for me, come for me. You know, Darren, those guys were sitting out there. And every once in a while I'd come out and they'd go, Rob, are you okay?

No. Come back in my room and pray. I was drinking my turmeric tea and everything I could think of to try to loosen up. So you can imagine this scene, you know, you're crying in bed and like, God, I just want to do this, but I have no idea how to do it.

And all of a sudden, he reminds me of this clip. I mean, very specifically, and you might notice that Bagger has something about your grip on your club, has a lot to do with your grip on your life. And so I'll let you listen to this and we'll talk about it. You going to be wanting a different club there, Junor? I can't do this.

Hey, you might as well just loose your grip up a smidge, you know, a man's grip on his club just like a man's – That's not what I'm talking about. I know. No, you don't. What I'm talking about is a game, a game that can't be won, only played. You don't understand. I don't need to understand. And a soul on this entire earth ain't got a burden to carry. He don't understand.

You ain't alone in that. But you've been carrying this one long enough. Time to go on, lay it down. I don't know how.

You got a choice. You can stop where you can start. Start? Walking. Where?

Right back to where you've always been and then stand there. Still. Real still. And remember, it's too long ago. Oh, no, sir, it was just a moment ago. Time for you to come on out to shadows, Junor. Time for you to choose. I can't.

Yes, you can. But you ain't alone. I'm right here with you.

I've been here all along. I played a game. Your game. The one that only you was meant to play.

The one that was given to you when you come into this world. Take a stance. Strike that ball, Junor. Don't hold nothing back.

Give it everything. Now's the time. Let yourself remember. Remember your swing. That's right, Junor.

Settle yourself. Let's go. Now is the time, Junor. So I cut that off because we're heading in for a landing. But that clip, if you've listened to it enough and you do enough boot camps, it gets in your soul. And maybe you'll be at a point in your life where you don't know how you're going to take the next step, but you kind of know you got to. And you know you've got to kind of loosen your grip.

However that works out. And there are several things he says, and they're like, I don't know how to do it. And there isn't a person in this world that doesn't have a burden they don't understand.

Right? And that's exactly where I was. I had a burden, but I didn't understand really the lives that I was living under that was keeping me from being able to do what it is that I had trained and trained and trained and trained and trained to do. And so there I was. And you can stop or you can start.

But the magic of the thing is what my buddy Andy will tell you. Is I'm right there with you. And so, yes, I played it. And yes, I got to do the talk. And yes, I got to break all those agreements. And so much more.

That sometime another time we'll be able to hear my actual rendition of classical guys. But it was an amazing boot camp. And thank you for all the preparation God did. But there's a lot of guys that put so much into this. You know, it's even hard to explain, isn't it, Darren, all the effort of all the people that put their work into this? Yeah, a lot of behind the scenes stuff. And, you know, Jim Burecki and Rodney, two of them that just made everything kind of work this time that we'd have failed. This is the Truth Network.