The Call to Biblical Manhood, Part 1

Far too many men spend more time training dogs than training kids. Dr. Tony Evans explains why child raising isn't just a woman's job.

The reason why we've got chaos with kids is daddy can't be found. Celebrating 40 years of faithfulness, this is the alternative with Dr. Tony Evans, author, speaker, senior pastor of Oak Cliff Bible Fellowship in Dallas, Texas, and president of the Urban Alternative. Who decides what it means to be a real man?

Too often we leave that job to the people who write scripts for action movies or TV shows. Let's join Dr. Evans as he explores the biblical model of manhood. A man in a major university asked his class to go study the sitcom Seinfeld. Many of you watched that show when it was on the air and it was a huge success. He said, I want you to analyze why Seinfeld is so popular.

The students did their study and came back with their report. They said the reason that Seinfeld is so popular is that it has no plot. It meanders from week to week, scenario to scenario, and it is plotless programming. So we've concluded as a class that the reason it is so successful is because plotless people love plotless programming. That because the audience is plotless, they can relate to the plotlessness of the programs.

We're living in a day of plotless people living plotless lives watching plotless programs. We're living in a day when people have surrendered meaning to convenience and have surrendered purpose to existence. And this is nowhere seen as great as it is a dilemma, as it is in the lives of men. The struggle of manhood today has incited chaos in every other area of our lives. The refusal or failure of males to become men as God has defined them.

To be able to define themselves as God defines us has created havoc in every level. Now, we know there are many exceptions, but the reality is when you look at the scope of the decline of marriages, of churches, of the climate in the culture, much of it can be tied to the absence of Adam, men not being in their God-ordained space. Ezekiel 22, 30, God says, I tried to find a man to stand in the gap so I would not have to curse the land, but I could find none. Plenty of males, but I couldn't find a man. Jeremiah chapter 5 verse 1 says, they looked for a man among all the males and they couldn't find one, which means it is possible to be a male and not be a man.

The question of the hour today is are we making our males men or are we limiting them to simply their biology? In Genesis chapter 18, we are looking at a culture in chaos, in decline, and getting ready to experience judgment. Sodom and Gomorrah. Homosexuality had become the rule of the day. They were rapists. And then it talks about they were living in a context of social injustice by oppressing the poor. So you had homosexuality, you had violence, and you had social oppression. All of that is in Sodom and Gomorrah, the Bible says. And so God looked down and he saw the outcry, the evil decline of the culture and was preparing to judge it. In the midst of his preparation to rain down fire and brimstone on the moral and social decay that was occurring in these two cities that were the distance between Fort Worth and Dallas, he identifies a man named Abraham and he gives the men who are here today, starting with me, but applying to all, three things that every man needs to understand, every male needs to understand and every female needs to expect. If you're going to be God's man and experience God's involvement in your world. So let me jump out here first of all and say I am not seeking to be cultural. I am not seeking to be convenient.

And I'm not seeking to win friends. My job is to tell you what God says and what God thinks, not what the media purports. The question of the series is Adam, where are you? Not Adam and Eve, where are y'all? Adam, where are you?

Why? God created the man first because he would be the one God would be looking to first. Abraham is now in the vicinity of Sodom and Gomorrah, a decaying culture as you and I are living in today, a decaying culture for all three of the same reasons. And he gives him three things. Verse 19, I have chosen him. I have chosen him. The first thing of a man is to understand you've been drafted. You watch the NFL draft, the NBA draft. When you draft a player it's because you've got a position you want him to fill. You've got a role you want him to take up. You've got a purpose for drafting him for the improvement of your team. Every man has been created as a man as a draftee of God because he's got a post he wants you to fulfill and a purpose he wants you to accomplish. I have chosen him.

In the midst of this decay, in the midst of this culture, I found me a man. I've selected him. And I have chosen him for a purpose. How do I know he chose him for a purpose? Because verse 17 says, shall I hide from Abraham what I'm about to do?

In other words, I'm up to something. And to do what I'm up to, I found me a man. The point is, some of the things God wants to do he can't do because he can't find him a man. He can't at least do it the way he wants to do it because Adam is unlocatable.

He's in hiding. The first thing every male needs to understand is that you have a divinely orchestrated reason for your manhood. Now I know the culture wants to give you a whole bunch of reasons for your manhood, but God says for my manhood, your manhood, our manhood, I'm up to something, God says.

And that's why I chose him. So if a male is living his life never discovering what God wants out of his life, he is a misguided male. So he makes up his own rules along the way. Or he makes up the rules that his posse gives him.

Or he makes up the rules that the media gives him. And he defines himself in all kind of errant ways because he's going and working for a team that didn't draft him. When a man accepts Jesus Christ as his personal savior, he is drafted into the purpose of God. But unfortunately, many men who even go to church don't even care to know the purpose of God.

And therefore, they live distracted in the purposes of culture. It reminds me of the story of Hank Aaron when Hank Aaron, the baseball home run king for the Atlanta Braves came up to bat in a preseason game against the New York Yankees. Hank Aaron stood up at the plate and was getting ready for the pitch. And the catcher for the Yankees was Yogi Berra. Now, any good catcher is going to talk smack to the batter. So Yogi Berra looked up to Hank Aaron and said, Hank Aaron, you can't hit. Your mama can't hit.

Big man, little stick, talking noise to try to distract him. Finally, Yogi Berra said, hey Hank, the insignia, the writing on the bat, you've turned the wrong way. For you folks who know baseball, you know that the writing is supposed to face the batter because if the writing is not facing the batter, you can break the bat or reverberate on your hands very painfully. So the writing on the bat is supposed to face the batter. Yogi Berra said, Hank, you better look at the bat.

You don't have the writing, turn the wrong way. He was trying to distract him. But Hank Aaron wouldn't budge. Hank Aaron just kept looking at the pitcher. The next pitch that came across the plate, Hank Aaron hit it over the center field fence for a home run. Hank Aaron ran around first, ran around second, ran around third, came back to home plate, touched home plate and began to walk to the dugout. But halfway to the dugout, he stopped. He looked back at Yogi Berra. Hey, Yogi, just thought you might want to know I ain't come here to read. See, if you don't know why you hear, then wrong voices are going to distract you.

If you don't understand the purpose of God, because you're not living in the presence of God, because you're living in the presence of culture or your own desires or designs or what you learned from a father that did not have God as the center of his purpose, then you're going to create errant purposes and you will be distracted from the purpose of God. It's like the man who said I was dying to finish high school so that I could go to college. Then I was dying to finish college so I could start my career. Then I was dying to get married so I could start a family. Then I was dying for my kids to get 18 so that they could leave.

Then I was dying to be able to retire only to discover now I'm just dying. I've lived life without ever connecting it to a divine reason for being. The reason that Adam knew what he was supposed to do, it says God told Adam what he was supposed to do. He told Adam that this is the garden I want you to work in. He told Adam, he gave him specific instructions, is that Adam walked with God during the cool of the day.

Before he rebelled against God, he walked with God so God was free to tell him what he was up to. God has some plans for every man here, but he's not free to tell you what he is up to because you're not walking with him in the cool of the day. You're just visiting him on Sunday. He says I've got some stuff I am not going to hide from Abraham because he's been selected. He's been chosen for my purpose. Dr. Evans will come back in a moment with more about what we can expect from God when we stop visiting and start abiding. First though, I'm excited to tell you about our current featured resource. It's Tony's brand new book, Kingdom Men Rising, and it goes hand in hand with the message we've been listening to today.

Far too many men have been weakened by the false definition of what it means to be a man, coming from a culture that's at odds with God's biblical blueprint. Kingdom Men Rising looks beyond phony stereotypes, helping men understand who they were created to be and how they can rise up to the task and responsibilities God has given them. Be one of the first to get this powerful new book. We'll send you a copy as our gift when you help support Tony's work here on the air and around the world by making a contribution to the ministry.

And as a special bonus, we'll include all twelve lessons on both CD and digital download from his current series by the same name. Tony's even created a valuable Kingdom Men Rising Bible study that can help you learn more and better share this life-changing teaching with others. Get all the details at tonyevans.org before this limited-time offer runs out.

That's tonyevans.org. Or call 1-800-800-3222. I'll repeat that after part two of today's lesson, coming up after this. Wake up, men. You're more than a job title.

You're greater than the balance in the bank. Success fades, but character and courage leave a legacy that lasts. Don't let your yesterdays define your tomorrow.

You were made for much more. In a sequel to the instant bestseller Kingdom Man, Tony Evans' Kingdom Men Rising urges men to embody the greatness God's already given them. Look ahead, not behind you. Eyes forward. All God has for you is there for you right now.

But you've got to go and get it. Focus and faith are what's needed right now. Get the book Kingdom Men Rising today to discover how.

Find out more at tonyevans.org. So the first thing that a real man, what I call a kingdom man, has to understand is you have a divine design for God's glory and the expansion of his kingdom that includes all the other stuff we think about, work for. What good is a good looking car that won't move? What good is a brand new shiny with all the attachment cars and it's going nowhere? Because a lot of time, men are asking women to follow a parked car. We're not going nowhere. We don't know where we should be going, but we say, follow me into Never Never Land. The idea was God was going to tell Adam where to go so that by the time he gave him Eve, Adam knew where he was going.

So if you're a single woman here, you want to ask the man who wants to marry you, where are you going? Because I don't want to spend 50 years having gone nowhere following you. God told Adam where he was to go so that Eve could plug into that and therefore they would be going somewhere.

I have chosen you. God has a purpose. Proverbs 20 verse 5 says that in the heart of every man is a purpose, but the man must draw it out. In other words, God has already given you a reason for being in seed form and you can only grow it in pursuit and in relationship with Him. It doesn't come just because you have a good education or you've got a degree or you've got a business.

It doesn't come just because of that. It came to Adam because he was in sync with God and it came to Abraham because he was in sync with God as a way of life, not as a visit. Far too many men are living without a divine purpose.

They can talk about their career, they can talk about their business goals, they can talk about their finance, but when you ask them what is God's purpose for you, they get quiet because they've spent all of their time in school and none of their time in the kingdom. In Super Bowl 43, the Pittsburgh Steelers were two minutes left in the game. They threw a pass driving down the field to win the Super Bowl to Santonio Holmes. Santonio Holmes dropped the ball that would have put them in position to win the game.

He had failed. He slowly went back to the huddle after dropping a perfect pass. In the huddle, Ben Roethlisberger called his number again. Santonio, go for it again. In the next play, Santonio Holmes runs down to the edge of the end zone. He goes to the very end. Ben Roethlisberger throws him the pass. He reaches up high and catches it for the winning Super Bowl touchdown for the Pittsburgh Steelers. Now, the reason that he scored was two things happened at the very same time.

He reached high and caught the pass, but he touched low and had two feet in bounds. See, what God is calling men is to reach high but touch low, to grab heaven but to execute in history so that history is benefiting because you've reached high. What too many men are doing is asking their wives to reach high for them.

What too many men are doing is asking their wives or other people to do for them what God is waiting on the man to do because he wants to know, Adam, where are you? Because God always starts with the man. Now, I know that for many people that's not politically correct. That's not culturally acceptable.

Tough. That's what the Scripture says. And when we are operating out of that order, chaos enters into the life, the home, and the culture. He says, I'm not going to hide from Abraham what I'm about to do because this man is operating according to my authority and in relationship with me. That's the first thing.

Second thing. He says in verse 19, so that he may command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord and to do righteousness and justice. The misunderstanding is that it's the woman's job to raise the children.

That may come from the culture. It doesn't come from the Scripture. It says, I command Abraham to raise the children and to teach them righteousness and justice. Ephesians 6, 4 says, fathers, raise your children. In the Bible, it is the job of the man to raise the children, not the woman.

The Scripture says that I chose him and I want him to raise and train and command his children after him. The reason why we've got chaos with kids is daddy can't be found. Daddy's either sired them and left them physically or emotionally.

Daddy's neglected them or abused them. Thank God for all the great men we have in our church where this doesn't fit this category, but far too many men spend more time training dogs than training kids. And so we wind up with a generation of unfathered fathers becoming fathers.

So they have not had an example. That's why it says, I have chosen him so that he may command his children after him. It is absolutely critical that men take their stand in their relationship with God, in coming under God's authority.

If you don't know what it means to have a personal relationship with God through Jesus Christ, stay with us. Dr. Tony Evans will come back in a moment to talk about what it means and how it happens. In the time we have remaining, I want to mention that today's lesson is part of Tony's powerful series called Kingdom Men Rising. There are 12 full-length messages in this collection containing bonus content we won't have time to present on the air. As I mentioned earlier, it's yours as our thank you gift when you make a contribution to help us keep Tony's teaching on this station. Along with it, we'll also send you his just-released companion book, Kingdom Men Rising. There's even a comprehensive Bible study available if you want to dig deeper. This is a special limited-time package, so don't wait. Visit tonyevans.org today or reach out to our resource center at 1-800-800-3222, where team members are always on hand to help you.

That's 1-800-800-3222. Men grow up in a series of hoods—babyhood, boyhood, manhood. But making it all the way to biblical manhood takes a certain kind of growing Dr. Evans will tell us about tomorrow. Right now, though, he's back with this closing thought for today. If you've been listening to our broadcast and you have not personally trusted Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins so that He can give you the gift of eternal life right now, I want you to go to God and transfer your trust from any and everything else except the Son of God who died on the cross for your sins and arose from the dead. In fact, I'm going to say a little prayer, and you can repeat it after me. You just have to mean it for yourself. Heavenly Father, I know I'm a sinner and that I can't save myself.

I believe Jesus Christ, Your Son, died on the cross in my place for my sin, and I now am trusting Him alone to forgive me and to give me the gift of eternal life that He promised to give to anyone who came to Him for it. Thank you for saving me and help me from this day forward to live a life pleasing to you. Congratulations. Welcome to the family. God bless you. The Alternative with Dr. Tony Evans is brought to you by the Urban Alternative and is celebrating 40 years of faithfulness thanks to the generous contributions of listeners like you.